Amazing Race
Competition To The Fullest

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Miss Alli: A | Grade It Now!
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Thank you, wise man

Frats, arriving at the pit stop. "I think some contestants might have took us for, like, the bungling crooks in a movie, like the gang that couldn't shoot straight. Let them think we're non-contenders, but we know in our heart of hearts and in our minds that we are a force to be reckoned with." Welcome, Team Shower-Fresh Scent, you are team number one. "Totally a force to be reckoned with," Drew repeats.

Danza, arriving. Welcome, Team Danza, you are team number two.

Literally within a minute or so, here's the boys. Welcome, Team Esquire, you are team number three. They still look like hell, and they still look like they're going to hurt somebody. Rob is having none of the cheer of being practically tied for first place, none of the happy smiles from the greeter, and none of anything else happy, either. He's got the Tokyo Stompers crossed over his chest, and that matted hair is kind of making him look creepy. Sheesh, Rob! Brennan takes responsibility for politely saying hello to the greeter, because Rob? Is too mad. In an interview in which he, oddly enough, looks totally adorable, he says, "We arrived just beat, pissed off and angry…the game, it just beats you down, when you think you see an opening, and it just slams shut and there's nothing you can do about it." Beat, pissed off, and angry? "Beat" I get, but I'm thinking I missed how we got to "pissed off and angry." Back to the pit stop, where he grabs up his pack with anger that frankly goes way beyond gum. I think there's only one thing to say, and that one thing is, "Hmmmm." This is kind of a new thing for Rob, this level of being completely and obviously Esquirate (tm…well, Quotable Rob, actually).

Morning train to Bikaner. Nancy: "I never realized how being dirty affects how you feel." Emily applies make-up (I believe). Bill, as he and Joe wipe themselves with towelettes (or the same towelette, actually -- eeeeeewwww!): "Being fresh makes us feel good. We want to just feel like every day is like the first day of the race." And they feel that way because of the towelettes, I guess. Oh, my goodness. If you need ANOTHER reason why the Guido/rat joking was okay, try that on for size. If you knew guys who talked like that and always looked freshly pressed, and you knew they were facing a building full of rats, you'd laugh hysterically also.

Everybody off the train. They grab taxis. "As quickly as possible without speeding," Nancy says to her driver, and suddenly I have a thought. (I have no info on this, honestly, I'm purely speculating.) We've now seen (1) Esquire in episode one, clearly pissed off about Frank and Margarita zooming past them, for reasons that seemed completely mysterious; (2) Bill telling Joe not only that he was going too fast, but specifically NOT to speed; and (3) Nancy saying, "Quickly as possible without speeding." My conclusion? Had to be a rule. Had to be a rule that you couldn't speed, or ask your cab driver to speed. Not only would that explain all these weird instances, but it would make a TON of sense. You can't have teams encouraging their drivers to go nine hundred miles an hour down the streets of India. There have been times when some very fast driving seems to have occurred, but to me it has the stink of a rule. If it isn't a rule, then it must have been a strategy that speeding would only cause you to get pulled over, so in the end, it wasn't smart. But my guess? Some kind of a rule.

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Amazing Race

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