Amazing Race
Courteous? This Is A Race!

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Miss Alli: A | Grade It Now!
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Peru-ff beyond a reasonable doubt

In the Rob and Amber car, where they are far behind, he is saying that they're going to win the money. "Did I fail to mention that?" he wonders. "We're definitely winning the million." She adds that they'll have fun while winning. "In my mind, I've already won," he interviews. Yeah, yeah, that's the B-Rob script and it's kind of boring. But then in the car, he says, "But you know what? If we don't win it? We already won a million." He laughs. And...it's kind of true. She grins in the back seat. Lex sharpens a knife.

At the airport, Megan and Heidi are right with Greg and Brian. Brian lets them cut in, even, and then makes reference to "your cute little pink butt," which sounds much worse than it is, because in fact, one of those girls is wearing pants that say "PINK" across the ass, and it's a little unfair to that guy to not point out that he has a perfectly good reason for saying that. I mean, he may be a dick, but he's not really a dick for that. Megan and Heidi, unsurprisingly, giggle. These teams run toward the terminal and wind up on a shuttle with Uchenna and Joyce and Ray and Deana.

At American, here are Ron and Kelly and Ryan and Chuck. They ask about the landing times on the two flights, but Kelly cuts Ron off, saying that American won't know when the United flight lands. Fool! They might! You have to at least ask! Anyway, they purchase their American tickets, like fools who have never seen the show, ever. Oh, and then she makes some dumb comment about how they're "the All-American couple." Ick.

Meanwhile, at United, Lynn and Alex run inside to the ticket counter. They ask about the American and United flights, but they find that the American flight, while it leaves later, actually arrives sooner. Since the worst-case scenario will still find them back on United, they decide to at least try over at American. They take off walking.

Elsewhere, Gretchen, still on the freeway, thinks she and Meredith are going the wrong direction. She makes repeated use of both "doggone it" and "goddarn it." Missing in action: "Dagnabbit" and "Fuck all." She surmises that they will have to go all around the airport. Rob and Amber, on the other hand, have arrived at the airport at last. On the shuttle, Uchenna and Joyce are discussing the fact that they'll run into the American terminal first. They know, however, that that's the later-leaving flight. They discuss the possibility, however, that later-leaving can be earlier-arriving, and they wind up hopping off the shuttle at American. These teams get in line behind Patrick and Susan, and Susan fills them in on what they know. Somebody begs a cell phone, which they use to check on the United flight, because apparently, American won't tell them? That definitely makes American the assholes of the episode, which is sort of surprising, since what the teams would find out is that American arrives sooner, and that they're a sponsor. Good one! Bianca (I think) checks the status of the flight, and finds out that they're good where they are, because American leaves sooner.

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Amazing Race

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