Amazing Race
Divide And Conquer

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Miss Alli: B+ | Grade It Now!
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I hate Paris in the springtime...

Planes land, and now the drunken cameramen are running around the airport in Paris. Team Guido asks in French where the train is (well, la-dee-dah!), and they rush to it. Meanwhile, Rob explains to the camera that, "as expected," Joe and Bill have decided to bolt the alliance. "I'd say I was angry if I cared enough about them to really matter [sic]," Rob says, clearly angry. "As to them breaking their word," he continues, "it was going to happen eventually, so…" Rob is angry.

Team Danza and Team Esquire are still allies, though, and take off together for the Eiffel Tower. Team Guido, meanwhile, is boarding the train. Joe annoyingly crows that Team Guido is number one, beating everybody else, yakkety yak. They're starting to really bug me. Last week, they were cute, but this week, they are impossibly smug. Simmer down, boys. It's a short walk to the shit list.

Commercials. A bear buys beer. Heh.

Okay. In Paris, it appears that the lead teams among those who didn't FF are Team Guido, followed closely by the Esquire/Danza Group (EDG). Team Shower-Fresh and Lenny and Karyn are right behind. Phil explains that the ultimate destination today is the Arc de Triomphe. Pat and Brenda FF'd, so they're actually out in front, arriving at the Arc first. (Other teams, remember, only know they're going to the Eiffel Tower so far.) Team Guido gets to the Tower first, and annoyingly reminds us again of that fact. Okay, I didn't want to have to do this, but -- shut UP, Team Guido.

The next task that the non-FF teams have to perform is to run up to the second level of the Tower (not a short climb) and look at the "telescopic view." Looking through the telescope requires a ten-franc coin. They're to look for something "monumental." If they do it right, you see, they spot the Arc, with a yellow-and-white flag on it, and they know that's where they're supposed to go. Note that only one member can take on this task, and they have to decide who's going to do it before they know what it is. They're only told to pick someone with "strong legs and keen eyes."

EDG is right on Guido's tail, as is (surprisingly enough) Team Shower-Fresh Scent. Frank, Rob, and Kev get the call. Lenny and Karyn arrive, and (note well!) she instantly ORDERS him to go up. Kev is getting a little worn out on the run up the stairs. Lenny, in his most endearing moment yet, calls up to the lead teams on the stairs, "I'm on your ass!"

Rob and Frank are having difficulty. Guido spots the flag, and Bill runs back down, noting to Joe that EDG has arrived. (For all their Paris-knowing, you'll notice they haven't picked up much ground on EDG.) Frank is still looking through the telescope, and sure enough, he sees the Arc and the flag, and he and Rob are off. Drew, understanding mensch that he is, mentions to the cameraman downstairs that Kevin doesn't have good eyesight. "I don’t know if he was able to find that thing quick enough or not." Surprisingly, this is said with great sympathy. I think this is clearly the strongest relationship on the show, except maybe Team Ensure. Kev gets an assist from a lady up on the roof, spots the Arc, and runs back down to his boy. Karyn is screaming up to Lenny (a very, very bad idea), who cannot figure out what in the heck he's looking for. EDG leaves the tower and heads for the Arc.

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Amazing Race

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