11:35 PM. Drew and Kevin. Drew explains in an interview that this leg will be more brutal than the final leg, but his explanation kind of loses me. It has something to do with how fourth place was good when there were eleven teams, but it kind of sucks when there are four teams, but I'm not sure why this leg will be worse than the next one, when even third place will suck. Actually, second place will suck too. Anyway, Team Shower-Fresh makes it to a hotel, where they start trying to get information about flights. As they're at the counter trying to make phone calls, some girls come by, and Drew wonders aloud whether the place is a "house of ill refute" [sic]. Kevin allows as how there's at the very least a "big big party going on." He calls to check on flights, and he calls the person on the phone "my friend," as always. I adore Kevin.
1:25 AM. Esquire and Danza on their flight to Beijing. Rob has his black do-rag on. (How many of those does a boy need?) Brennan is wearing the Hating-Hat. Ack. They'll be in Beijing at 7:00 on the morning of Day Two.
1:30 AM. Guidos get the clue. As they make their way across the beach, Joe explains to us in the Horrid-Hat interview that "eventually, it's going to come down to the final three." Based on that, he says that he and Bill "need to be one of those three teams." Uhhhh…okay. Good thinking, Joe! At 3:48 in the morning, they make it to Phuket airport, where Kevin and Drew are booking their flights to Bangkok and then to Beijing.
Speaking of Beijing, let's go there now. Look! People on bicycles. And here's the EDG plane, landing. They scurry off the plane, and for whatever reason, Danza outperforms Esquire at the taxi stand (oh, I'm sorry -- I know why) and zooms off in the first cab. They arrive at Jingshan Park and start the climb up to the top pavilion. Margarita asks Loud Pushy Frank whether he thinks Rob and Brennan have gotten there yet, and he gives the only right answer to that question: "Don't know, don't care." Way to go, LPFrank.
Esquire, meanwhile, piles out of their cab and starts up as well.
Danza opens the Detour. This is actually one of the better detours I think they've come up with, because it actually presents an interesting choice. Choice one, "Volley," requires the team to go play ping-pong against a "local champion" and score five points. Phil reminds us that ping-pong is the national sport in China, so perhaps teams shouldn't hold their breath. Choice two, "Rally," requires the teams to complete a three-part transportation race, including a bus, a motorcycle, and a rickshaw. Danza decides to do the ping-pong, which I have to say struck me as absolutely insane when I saw them do it. But then, I'm really bad at ping-pong. I could be soundly beaten by the champion of the Lilliputian Table Tennis Federation. I probably wouldn't even score five points.
Here comes Esquire. They read the Detour clue. "Let's do the ping-pong -- we've got our driver, we're good at ping-pong…" "They're probably going to kick our butt," Brennan says prophetically.