Amazing Race
Five Continents, 25 Cities, and More Than 40,000 Miles

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Commercials. I'm so tired of Star Wars already, for a movie that isn't even out yet.

The next morning, Frenchman's Cove. Bonjour! (Yeah, I don't know.) Ron and Amber get a taxi to take them to Grants Level. In the taxi, Rob comments to Amber that they have a 33 percent chance at a million dollars -- "more money than most people make in a lifetime." Not them personally, of course, especially once they hit middle age and start selling the rights to their flexible sigmoidoscopies, but most people. Ron and Kelly get a taxi as well. At 8:30, Uchenna and Joyce follow. On the way out, Uchenna and Joyce comment on the fact that they're going to start out those 15 minutes behind Ron and Kelly and Rob and Amber. Speaking of whom, here come Rob and Amber and Ron and Kelly to Grants Level. There, they open a clue, which is to this week's Detour. In this Detour, you choose between "two river activities," as Phil puts it -- Raft It and Build It. In Raft It, you travel eight miles down the river on a traditional raft, steering with a pole. In Build It, you build the bamboo raft yourself, and then you cross the river on it and climb a hill to find the clue. Rob comments that eight miles on the river will take two hours, just as Ron is telling Kelly that "eight miles is a long way." Both teams go with Build It, though Kelly essentially refuses to participate and orders Ron to make the decision for the team, which you can basically tell she's doing so that if it goes to hell, she can bitch at him. Her passive-aggressiveness is in full bloom at this point, and all he can really do is sit back and be flummoxed, which, fortunately, is kind of what he specializes in anyway. He reminds her he's never built a raft, but somehow, you can tell that he's on the hook for this decision nevertheless.

Rob and Amber start on their raft. Ron and Kelly start on theirs, too. Basically, these are raft kits, with all the holes pre-drilled and so forth. You're not building them so much as you are assembling them, as you would if you had bought them at Ikea to decorate your dorm room. Meanwhile, Uchenna and Joyce arrive, ask their driver to wait, and pull the clue. They, too, pick the Build It option, given that they also think eight miles is a long way. Uchenna thinks they can pick up some ground if they build the raft in a smart way. He puts on the gloves, which turns into some kind of grasshopper/ant metaphor when Rob turns down the gloves when Amber offers. Uchenna stores up soft, pliable skin for the winter, while Rob spends all his bleeding hands on acorns right now, or something. Ron is putting on the gloves, too, although it's a little late, because he already has cuts on his hands. Amber tries again to get Rob to put the gloves on after he cuts his finger, but he won't put them on. And the look on her face after this occurs is an absolutely priceless smile that says, "I am going to have the best time ever when he admits later that I was right."

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Amazing Race

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