Amazing Race

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The Phuket List

The Whites have gotten to the zoo surprisingly quickly, where they find their clue, sit for their photo with the tiger (who yawns for the camera with them), and go jogging in search of the elephants. "I think we're last," Mike says. Alas, I think so too.

Kisha and Jen have joined the group in the herb shop, and Jaime warns them about how slow the dude is. Jaime, everyone has to wait on him, not just you. As long as nobody gets out of there before you, you aren't falling behind. Right then, of course, the Stuntmen get their clue on their very next try. "Are you fricking kidding me?" Jaime bitches as they leave the store to read their clue. At least that's one less drawer they have to try.

The Stuntmen's clue tells them this is a Detour, which Phil describes as "Two forms of physical labor that are well known to the residents of Phuket." The options are "100 Barrels" and "2 Miles." 100 Barrels sends teams to the docks, where Phil says they will "work to prepare a fishing ship for ten days at sea." That sounds labor-intensive. Fortunately, all it means is that 47 plastic barrels have to be filled with drinking water, and 53 empty ones to hold the voyage's catch need to be loaded up and arranged on the boat's roof. That sounds way easier than being stuck on a boat for a week and a half with 53 barrels of dead fish exposed to the tropical sun. "2 Miles" requires teams to go to a temple and pick out one of the rickshaws waiting there. Of the several varieties of rickshaw in existence, these are the kind pulled by a person on foot. There are also foot-operated tire pumps arranged nearby in case someone gets a flat. Then one team member pulls the other on foot in the rickshaw to King Rama IX Park, but apparently they can switch places at will, as we'll see. The Stuntmen opt for 2 Miles, obviously. As they interview afterwards, "We're four-nine and a hundred pounds soaking wet. Pulling each other for two miles, that was a no-brainer." Sounds about their speed.

The Whites get walked and sat on by pachyderms, just to add to the indignities they've suffered today. Team Go Team and Kisha|Jen are still in the herb shop, with Jaime still yelling at the poor dude. Mel and Mike get their photo. "We look cool," Mike says. So far that's the best thing that's happened to them all day. In their cab to the herb shop, Mel says, "That elephant stepped on my butt." Good. Less to haul now.

Team Family Law arrives at the herb shop and joins the rotation, along with Luke and Margie. Everyone's still coming up empty, but Tammy and Victor are at least using a notebook to keep track of which drawers everyone else is having the proprietor open. Kisha and Jen are the next to get a drawer with a clue in it, and they're out of there in second place. They're doing 100 Barrels. Back in the shop, after a few more turns, Margie lets Luke override her choice, and there's a clue inside the one he picks. Good call, both of you. Off they go in third, while Jaime gets more and more frustrated, to the amazement of anyone who thought such a thing couldn't even be possible. I'm wondering if the Race has plans to find new and different ways to push her until she actually murders someone. Tammy and Victor finish next, and go off to do 2 Miles in fourth place while Jaime renews her yelling. Funny thing, raising her voice doesn't seem to make the shopkeeper move any faster.

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Amazing Race

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