11:53 PM. Fran and Barry. In an interview, Barry proudly has his arm around Fran and her psychotic purple hat as he salutes her "mental toughness." He calls his wife "a rock." And then, as he does with all immovable objects, he runs her over with their car. Ha ha! Just kidding! (Spoiler!)
Eric and Jeremy arrive at the train station. They get inside and find that the station is not actually open yet, and will not open until 4:00 AM. I have a feeling that's enough time for twenty or thirty sexual encounters for either one of them, so I think I know what they're going to be doing with their free time. They also learn from the bored security guard that their 8:00 AM train is indeed the first one to Rome. Ah -- perhaps we will finally get a nice bunch and stop watching the same teams march around single-file like kids at a fire drill. BJ and Tyler are just behind them getting to the station, and when they get there, BJ calls out, "What's the story, ladies?" Because insulting guys by calling them women is exactly what you do when you're searchers for the funny and ironic. Not to mention the blisteringly original. I can sort of understand how this entire knot of assholes could end up drunk off their asses half-naked and reaching for each other's underwear. After a while, there's nowhere to go with your shtick but directly to the "getting drunk and doing it" place. Or so I've heard.
12:17 AM. Lake and Michelle. She explains as they leave that nothing that's happened to them has "affected [their] commitment to being a team." They start to bicker almost immediately, however, about the directions and the piece of paper and something that they appear to be missing already. "It's your fault this time," she ultimately declares, and he responds, "It's my fault because you didn't pick it up, yeah." "I don't know what else you want," she says. "I didn't git it!" he comes back, cranking up the accent that always means things are about to get either very ugly or very funny. We're one "dadgummit" away from disaster. "It doesn't matter," she says, quite passive-aggressively. "You didn't hand me the damn piece of paper," he insists, "or the sumbitch would be on me!" Utterly unable to drop it any more than he can, she mutters, "It's a big mistake on your part." "You never handed it to me, bitch, now shut up," he says, sailing right over the line without even apparently seeing it going by. "I didn't make a mistake this time, Lake," she says calmly, "but I'm going to take the blame, because I usually do." Why, when I was just starting to like him more, did he have to go to "bitch, now shut up" in a way that sounds kind of serious and mean? I wish he wouldn't do that.