And now, Eric and Jeremy. They are your two Dudes. Their discussion to go on the race undoubtedly proceeded thusly: "Dude?" "Dude!" They are a bartender and a valet, but I suspect that their actual occupation is "Unemployment Check Collector." Eric says that they work as little as possible, and they try to mostly hang out at the beach. I have nothing against enjoying your leisure time, but I do have a problem with how edgy they seem to think it makes them. Working enough to handle your financial obligations while reserving as much of the rest of your time for the activities you enjoy is not exactly putting you on the cutting edge of American culture. It's not like the rest of us are getting up and going to the office because we can't think of anything we'd rather be doing. They announce, as if it makes them even more wicked and dangerous, that they'd like to be millionaires, but not by working. Boy, that is a pretty unconventional viewpoint. With the exception of the tens of millions of people who play the lottery and everyone who comes on this show, I can't think of anyone who shares it. I don't really hate them yet; I just find them achingly pedestrian. It would help if I found either one of them even one percent attractive, which I don't. Eric is unsuccessfully fighting a hairline issue, for one thing, which isn't at all disqualifying unless you're still trying to get by on "Dude!" as your manifesto.

Lisa and Joni are sisters of a certain age. They refer to themselves as "Glamazons," because they like tiaras, and they are very tall. Their introductory footage includes the use of a Bedazzler. See, BJ and Tyler, sometimes you don't even have to search for what's funny and ironic. Sometimes it comes to you, with sparkles attached to it. I'm also fascinated by the fact that they leg-wrestle each other. On first glance, I sort of like them.

Fran and Barry. They've been married for 40 years. Fran is wearing a camisole in their interview, which is pretty cool of her, and which I don't blame her for, considering that it looks like she has pretty good guns for a lady who's been married that long. She explains that they "are each other's biggest fans." She promises that they know each other so well that they will read each other's faces and so forth. I'm not wild about the shorts-over-leggings thing she's working in their hiking footage. Barry posits that they are way too bad-ass to play the role of the nice grandparents. Sigh. Well, it's nice to know that the erroneous belief that competitiveness and niceness are mutually exclusive isn't limited to the younger competitors. Barry also claims that they've "competed against younger people all of [their] life." What, so when they were 20, they played Little League? That assertion makes absolutely no sense. Fran claims that they will be "steamrolling" the other teams.