Amazing Race
Here We Go, Baby, Off To Win A Million Bucks

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Brazil nuts

Wanda and Desiree finally get in through the right entrance, and they wind up choosing the farthest building. As Desiree explains it, they saw that it was the farthest, but it was the first one they found in the book. It's not impossible that that's a good choice, since the farthest one is only a couple of miles farther than the nearest one, and you could easily spend a lot of time flipping around in a book, to the point where it wouldn't pay off. Again, I think Desiree has good racing skills, and she also seems to have the ability to consider the options and then decide something, which is something that sometimes hangs up lesser teams. They take off in fourth position, of helicopter-detour people.

Danielle and Dani are arriving at the motorcycle shop. As soon as they get out of the cab, they start demanding that one of the guys who's standing around come in and help them. They grab one and draft him with a big kiss, but I have no idea why they think he's necessarily going to know how to put together a motorcycle. It doesn't come with the penis, you know. They drag the guy inside, but he still doesn't have any idea how to put together a motorcycle. Finally, he leaves in this way that's sort of hilariously anticlimactic. They begin to talk about whether they're actually capable of putting this thing together. They have chosen poorly, as the Twinkly Music Of Idiocy that plays throughout this scene is eager to tell you.

Joseph and Monica get to the bridge, and when they find the box, Fran and Barry finally spot it by following them. Both teams get their clues. Joseph and Monica choose Rotorhead, but Fran decides that because she's good at assembling things, they should do the motorcycle. My favorite part is that as they're leaving, Fran says, of the clue box they missed, "I don't think it was there before." I hate it when clue boxes spontaneously arrange themselves out of loose atoms, don't you? Both of these teams get cabs for the airport.

Lake and Michelle and Ray and Yolanda get up onto the bridge. In what is literally my favorite moment of the entire episode, Joseph looks out of his taxi and sees Lake and Michelle running toward the clue box. "Oh. There is Scott Peterson, right there," he says. That is so mean and so understandable. Because it's a horrible, horrible thing to say, but it's exactly the kind of thing that some of my very favorite people would say in the same situation. Or at least I hang out with them partly because I hope they would. Anyway, Lake and Michelle get their clue, and they pick Motorhead, with him saying that he can put it together. In the cab, she laments, "I've never put anything together, ever." He comes back with, "Don't second-guess it, or we won't go there." It's very "Don't complain, or you'll get no dessert." "Do what you want," she says. And then he gets mad again, and orders, "Don't second-guess me." Booooo. They are not going to be fun to watch.

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Amazing Race




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