Karyn and Lenny have a really unsettling conversation…well, she has a conversation with herself, for the most part…in which she tries to express her excitement, and Lenny still is clearly carrying his Arc Agony and doesn't talk to her. Elsewhere, Nancy uses her Magical Mom Powers to guess that "somebody didn't make the train." Cut to Dave and Margaretta, at the station. Cut to Pat and Brenda, back by the sewer.
Commercials. John Cusack, I want to marry you.
Drunken cameramen frolic atop the ruins, where Phil shows us the flag. Drew and Kevin arrive, and are greeted by the mayor of Les Baux de Provence, who tells them they're in first. They hug. "Who's better than us, here, on top of the South of France?" Drew wonders as they stare at the gorgeous view. "With everybody lookin' at our behinds, no less." Heh.
Back at the train station, Dave and Margaretta get the next train. Phil explains that there's a standard "tourist" way to get to Les Baux, which is to take the train from Paris to Marseilles, and then a taxi from Marseilles to the castle. Locals, however, know to get off at Avignon and then take a cab from there, which is a good hour faster. Right on cue, Team Guido jumps off at Avignon, with Joe muttering that "this might turn out to be the best little trip we ever found." EDG gets off at Avignon as well. The Underdogs wonder what to do. They've already been screwed by Team Guido, after all. Speaking of whom, Bert and Ernie (hee!) do entirely too much fist-pumping and chanting of the word "Yes!" as they speculate about all the ground they're going to gain on everyone by getting off at Avignon. I need them to shut up. I need it bad. Somewhere in a cab, Brennan explains that Rob met up with a guy on the train who happened to know about the shortcut. They passed the info to Frank and Margarita, who didn't deserve it. Ever ungrateful, Frank and Margarita bitch in their cab about how Esquire is only keeping them around "because they [Esquire] already used their Fast Forward" and "for [Margarita's] language skills." Well, yeah. They're hoping you'll be helpful. Just like they were just helpful to you, you stuck-up turds. Danza announces that their interest in the alliance is over. Yeah, it's really not paying off for you, there, guys. Good thinking! Morons.
The Underdogs almost get off the train at Avignon, but they don't. Darn. I would have liked to see the Foiling of the Guidos be pulled off more completely. The Underdogs swear their solidarity, which seems sort of genuine, actually.