Wally and the Tonyas are welcomed as team number two. The Gadzookskis come in next. Welcome, pinks, you are team number three. Phil asks them whether they're happy about the Yield situation, and they pronounce themselves "very happy." Christine wraps up their day with an interview in which she admits that she likes to talk, but she vows that she'll "back off" if it's bugging her sisters. Which I think it is, so the backing off could probably commence any time now. The pinks high-five.

And now, we return to the straggling Weavers. The Yield runs down, and they give the Roadblock to Rolly (of course). They get the clue and get in the car, chattering about how they really just want to be eliminated. And this is where, in my ideal world, a giant mechanical claw would descend from the sky, pluck them out of the car, and drop them at their doorstep, because I despise quitters. You want out? Go home. I won't miss you.

They drive up to the library, and Phil tells them they're last. And then he tells them that they're not eliminated, and they're completely not happy about it. Phil calls them on their "unenthusiastic reaction," and Rolly says that it's because nobody likes them. Phil proceeds to take all their money and all their stuff. He then comments that they don't seem to even care what's going on. Mama explains that although they enjoy the race, she's not "up for" all the "personal stuff." Like sitting around at the Yield calling people names, for instance. That kind of personal stuff. Phil gives them a big pep talk (shut UP, Phil) about how other teams have been known to come from behind and win, blah dee blah. Mama interviews that she was ready to quit until Phil's "words of encouragement" told her that she could still win. She brags about how they got lost and Yielded and still "[came] back from it." No, you didn't! You weren't eliminated because there was no elimination, dummy! That's not a comeback! She pronounces them "ready to win." Bleh.

Executive Producer? Jerry Bruckheimer.

What's revolting to me about that entire thing isn't so much that Phil showed kindness to them, not that they deserve it. It's that the race has become so fucking soft. Phil shouldn't have to give a goddamn pep talk so you don't shrivel up like a mouse and quit. Phil didn't give words of encouragement to Flo; that was Zach's problem to deal with, which means that the team had to come up with enough drive between them to keep going, even if it all came from one person. If your team lacks the will to go on, then shut the hell up and go home, you know? This entire thing, with the stupid tasks and the easy everything and the random eliminations and Phil turning into a den mother, just makes it a different show. It's this Disney bullshit where it's all about who's mean and who's nice, and what's missing is a sense of urgency. The teams don't particularly seem to care, with the exception of maybe the Linzes, about winning.