Here's some B-roll of San Francisco, and the plane touches down at the airport. As everyone waits to disembark, Cord says, "It's on like Donkey Kong." Dan and Jordan are indeed the first off the plane, and Brent is left back in steerage wondering, "Is there any way we can cut through?" The Cowboys chuckle at the silly sasquatch. The brothers get in a cab to the Presidio and are on their way while the models are still in the terminal and the Cowboys are just getting off the plane. "That was huger than huge," Dan says. It was a genius move, and now everybody's going to be trying it for every leg of every Amazing Race until the end of time, making it harder for me to do it. Thanks, Dan and Jordan. Good thing I like my exit rows just fine.
Brent and Caite get a cab, followed by the Cowboys. "As usual," Cord remarks. Soon Dan and Jordan are in the Presidio, specifically Langdon Court, specifically Battery Godfrey. The clue in the box, if you can believe this, is an actual riddle: "I was built in 1933. I'm 210 feet tall. My insides are lined with murals painted by 26 different artists. What am I?" I'd say Brent, but he looks too young. Phil tells us that this refers to Coit Tower, and the camera swoops over the city to show it off. "Located at the top of Telegraph Hill and offering a 360-degree view of the city, this historic structure is where they'll find their next clue." Dan and Jordan return to their cab and show the clue to the driver. The driver is like, "Long pause."
Brent and Caite are also at the Presidio, but they're making the unhappy discovery that their driver doesn't seem to know where he's going, or indeed very much English at all. Meanwhile, the Cowboys' driver tells them, with exquisite lack of precision, "Almost somewhere near here." "That sounds like my whole life," Cord says.
Brent and Caite stop to look at a map outside a visitor's center for directions, sniping at each other angrily. And this is when the Cowboys pass them. That's not a moment that determines the outcome of the race, but there are so few changes in rank this episode that I feel the need to highlight them.
The brothers, meanwhile, flag down a bicyclist and get about halfway through reading the clue to him before he says, "Coit Tower." Dude wants to get back to his ride. Back in the cab, Jordan declares, "People who ride bicycles are smart. It's a general rule." I was not aware of that rule. I was aware of the rule that bicyclists meet certain standards of balance and coordination, but now that I know they are Google on two wheels, I have no reason to buy an iPhone. Back at the visitor's center, the models' cabbie has joined them to decode the map, which doesn't help with their frustration level. "This is why I ___wanted somebody who could speak English," Caite carps. I think it is more valid to complain about a language barrier in one's home country. Which is not to say it's valid to put oneself in a position where one has to deal with a language barrier in one's home country in the first place. The Cowboys are the next to find the clue leading them to Coit Tower. Luckily, they bought The Smart Guide to San Francisco in the Shanghai airport, and the description rings a bell. Even better, their cabbie knows where Coit Tower is. Well played, Cowboys. And boo, Amazing Race. This is what happens when you make people sit in an airport for so long that they have nothing to do for hours but research the next destination.









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