Amazing Race

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M. Giant: A- | Grade It Now!
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Huger than Huge

Dan and Jordan have arrived at Coit Tower, and from the cab window, Jordan can see a tiny little yellow clue envelope flapping in the breeze from an overhanging scaffold near the summit. They run up the steps to the high patio. Phil tells us that the tower has been an icon of San Francisco since the 1930s, and now someone from each team will have to climb it. In this Road Block, that person will have to use an "ascender" to ratchet himself (or herself, but who are we kidding) up a rope hanging outside the tower, then grab the clue and get lowered down. Dan is doing this one, and he starts climbing.

Jet and Cord are also on their way to Coit Tower, and quite wound up. In fact, Jet says he's about to shake out of his shoes. Now I know why cowboys wear boots.

Caite both is yelling at her driver to turn around and calling him a dumb-ass. Brent says that's not helping. She says he isn't helping, and adds that she wants to punch him in the face. Seriously, this happens. You know how winning teams tend to not have meltdowns? This is not a winning team. Sorry if that's a spoiler.

Dan is getting tired, and is about halfway up the tower when the Cowboys arrive below. "You can catch 'im," Jet encourages Cord. We'll see how that goes.

The models are finally dropped off near the clue box at Battery Godfrey. "Thank you, sorry, thank you," Brent says as they head for the last remaining clue there. "We're gonna have to rock and roll through everything now," Brent says as they get back in the cab. Again with the analysis.

Dan reaches the top and grabs the clue, and is lowered back down while Cord is still getting suited up in his climbing harness. So much for catching him. Cord looks about ready to say fuck the harness and scale that tower with his fingernails. Dan and Jordan are still in first place as Jordan reads, "Find the Yoda Fountain." Yes, that's just what it sounds like; as we now see, there's a fountain featuring a statue of the Jedi Master Yoda somewhere in San Francisco. Well, what other city would it be in? Oh, it's at the headquarters of Lucasfilm, Ltd, so that makes more sense. Phil says that's the home of special effects company Industrial Light and Magic. Jet and Cord call out goodbyes to the departing brothers and are ignored. "Not too talkative, are they? Kind of pissy," Jet observes. Maybe it was the threat of violence back in Shanghai. The brothers' cabbie doesn't know any more about Yoda Fountains than he does Coit Towers, so Dan asks him to call someone. "If you want to start driving as you're calling," Dan suggests, not really suggesting so much as ordering. Cord finally gets to begin his climb. Whoever the brothers' driver calls tells him to head back to the Presidio. Jet gives Cord props for how quickly he's going, and Dan realizes that the Cowboys will be able to do it as fast as he did, if not faster, which keeps the pressure on. Cord continues his ascent.

Brent and Caite are talking to a hotel clerk, who gets online and sends them to the Coit Tower. And Brent has a new plan of action for dealing with the taxi driver: "Let's just shut up and let him go," Brent says. I especially like the "Let's just shut up" part.

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Amazing Race

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