Amazing Race

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The Couch Trip

Gary and Mallory's car is at about two o-clock, which means they're roughly but two-thirds done. Sure enough, their onscreen clock reads just over four minutes as Mallory looks at the large, multiple slabs of fried meat still on both their plates. I'm starting to think the only way to complete this task on time would have been to bring a dog.

Jet and Cord arrive at the library, and despite still being in last place, they aren't in too much of a hurry to admire the interior of the place before collecting their clue. They agree to do the couch, which is good, because the last thing they need is to have to attempt both Detour options.

Mallory uses the final seconds of her ride with Gary to spear a bunch of giant meat-hunks with her fork and then dump them on Gary's nearly-empty plate. Obviously that's not going to cut it, so they get the same buzzer as the first two teams to attempt this. And that's enough to earn them a commercial break.

Back from some more Ford Focus commercials, Mallory still isn't ready to give up. She apologizes, but Gary takes the blame, saying, "I should have listened to you, Mallory." "I can throw up and try it again," she offers, which is probably the most beauty-queen thing I've ever heard her say, but Gary isn't going to let that happen. Father of the year. You don't want that weighing on your psyche when you go into the Freud Museum anyway.

Jet and Cord are jogging there now, Cord narrating that they knew they were last. And boarding the train, Gary drops a little race science on us: "Whenever you gotta do both sides of a Detour, that's bad. You really let people catch up." Good thing Mallory has a race expert along with her.

The Globetrotters are at the bottom of a steep, narrow street where the little dolly is pretty much useless, so Big Easy heaves the whole couch up onto his head. Yikes. When Kent and Vyxsin get to the same point, Kent can't even lift his end, let alone the whole thing, so he and Vyxsin switch places, I guess because the front is harder. Kisha is worried about their rug dragging on the street. "It did not say anything about keeping it clean," Jen points out. Maybe she threw up on it after all. Zev and Justin are still burping when they reach the Freud Museum and load up their couch. The Globetrotters are now wheeling their couch through lanes of busy traffic. You'd think that if any city in the world would have couch lanes it would be Vienna, but that doesn't seem to be the case. Kent and Vyxsin are walking along the sidewalk when Kent suddenly starts wailing, "It's gonna faaaall! It's gonna faaaall!" Vyxsin just drops her end hard and makes him switch ends again, and tells him to quit whining. Jen and Kisha's dolly is getting hung up on chunks of sidewalk salt, so they switch to carrying it side by side. Zev and Justin are making the same decision on a different corner when they spot the Cowboys. "They're gonna pass us," Justin frets. "No they're not," Zev insists. But the Cowboys have gotten a morale boost just from seeing another team for the first time on this continent, even though they don't have their couch yet. But they find the museum quickly enough and grab their couch, so maybe Zev and Justin are in trouble after all.

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Amazing Race

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