Amazing Race
I Carried a Watermelon

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All About the Melons

After the ads, Elliot and Andrew are considering going back inside to finish the harp task. Ralph and Vanessa are also trying to make a decision. Andrew decides, "I'm going back and I'm gonna get it done. I don't care if it takes me all day." Interesting use of the first-person singular there. Think that might have anything to do with the difficulties they've been having? Ralph says they'll have to start over and Vanessa stands there defeated while he begins dismantling. "It's all right. Keep throwing me watermelons," he says. Or start throwing them, as the case may be. Back in the auditorium, Eliot says, "It is what it is, but we're gonna finish." I like how people have stopped pretending "it is what it is" is anything other than a family-friendly swear word. Back at the market, Ralph asks Vanessa if she wants to quit, but she still doesn't. As she says in an interview, Ralph has a thirteen-year-old daughter and they have to show her it's not okay to quit. Just like Vanessa never quit stalking Ralph. "Hell or high water, we're gonna finish it," she vows They kiss and get to work.

Rachel and Dave are still waiting on the bench, with 47 minutes left in their penalty and hoping other teams are also screwed. You know you're in trouble when that's your strategy. Meanwhile, Brendan and Rachel have arrived at the Plaza de la Democracia. Rachel starts doing the task, just as Team Jersey shows up. Joey "Fitness" is taking this one. Then it's Bopper and Mark, and Mark is doing this. Soon, they're all attempting the task. Rachel seems to get almost to the end before smashing her bottle. "Sorry. Do you have a broom?" she asks someone. Well, if someone didn't, this plaza would be very crunchy. Joey "Fitness" gets to the same point and fails as well. Now here are Nary and Jamie, currently in sixth and Nary's doing this. Then it's Kerri and Stacy, and it's Kerri's turn. We see them both attempting it, but Rachel is done, finishing up with her best Event Hostess smile and pausing to take a bow and bounce her own melons up and down before collecting the clue. She not only finished quickly, she's mostly dry, so she obviously did well. They're now in third place as they read the clue sending them to the Pit Stop on foot. Hence Rachel's Annoying Habit #21: Doing well at challenges and thus putting me in a position to have to spend more time putting up with Rachel's Annoying Habits #1-20.

Mark and Kerri both drop their bottle and the entire bottom falls out of Nary's while it's on her head. See? This is hard. As Team Big Brother leaves the Roadblock, Rachel spots Team Jersey breathing down their neck. Brendon spurs them into a run. Rachel's suddenly crying and nearly getting run over by traffic (which is horrible, because I hate it when Rachel cries for no reason), but they're the next to make it to the mat. Rachel crouches dramatically on the mat like she's trying to cough out her diaphragm (both of them, possibly) while Brendon encouragingly tells her she just killed a Detour and a Roadblock. Of course he does; that's why she's crying, so he will. Joey "Fitness" and Danny join them on the mat, looking not much less winded. Rachel's happy to hear they're the third team to arrive, but because of the penalty, they're officially team number two and Joey "Fitness" and Danny are team number three. Other Rachel and Dave, with thirty minutes still on their penalty, watch them celebrate from the bench just hoping to stay in the race at this point. To win the first two legs only to get beaten in the third by Team Big Brother and Team Jersey has to sting.

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Amazing Race

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