Amazing Race
I Didn't Make Her Cry

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The Gloves Come Off

Vanessa and Ralph are the last team to get to the travel agency. By the time they're sitting down, Rachel walks by disingenuously saying, "I wish there was a quicker flight than 10 AM." Vanessa laughs and says she isn't buying that, but Rachel's sticking to her story. Not to worry -- as soon as Rachel is gone, Vanessa mocks her robotically bad acting. Team Kentucky and Team No Longer Undercover book their seats on the plane, as do Ralph and Vanessa and after a nighttime shot of a plane on the runway, Phil and the Amazing Red Line tell us that everyone's on the same flight to Kilimanjaro, Tanzania via Nairobi, Kenya. Oddly, we see the teams getting off the plane at the Jomo Kenyatta International Airport in Nairobi. Which never happens, so that tells us something's going to go down during the plane transfer. Rachel tells Brendon to jog, and they bump past Ralph and Vanessa in the narrow concourse and then Brendon flips Ralph off to boot. The camera doesn't catch it, but Ralph did and so did Art, who immediately tells JJ about it. Soon they're in line together and the tension is rising as Ralph (somehow now back in front of Team Big Brother with Vanessa) warns Brendon to watch where he puts his finger. I could have told him that last summer. "I'm here to play, baby," Brendon tools, like flipping the bird is playing.

But behind Brendon, the Border Patrol tells him they're here to follow and haven't played the game yet. Rachel snaps at everyone to get out of their faces, but soon Vanessa's getting into it, arguing with Rachel about which of them shoved the other. "I'm much smaller than you," Vanessa points out. "I don't take up that much space." The other teams are laughing at the rising hostilities until Rachel calls them all crazy and Vanessa says dismissively, "Put on more sparkles." Advantage: Vanessa. As always. Ralph tells her to stop and she says she will. But since Rachel's not done yet, neither is Vanessa. "How old are you?" Rachel asks Vanessa, which is quite a question coming from an individual of Rachel's emotional maturity. "Aren't you, like, 38?" Wow, really? Maybe Vanessa wasn't kidding about her plastic surgery back in Turin. Vanessa confirms that's her age and adds, "And somehow I still look younger than you." Mean, but true. "Honey, get your nose done before you get your boobs done," she continues. "Do everybody a favor." Yow, look who brought a gun to a knife fight. Rachel stands there with her mouth open, in the typical shocked expression she deploys when anyone is as rude to her as she so frequently is to others. I'd invite her to chew on that through the commercial break, if her mouth were not for once completely immobilized.

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Amazing Race

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