Amazing Race
I Didn't Make Her Cry

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The Gloves Come Off

Art and JJ tell their driver to slow down as they pull up next to something that looks like a destination, but it turns out to just be Japanese tourists with cameras. It's actually kind of amazing that this show doesn't see more of those. They tell their driver, Richard, to drive on. Behind them, Brendon and Rachel get directions from another group of people who tell them to go back the way they came. Rachel's frustrated at this development, but as Brendon correctly points out, "As of right now Art and JJ are out in front, in the wrong direction, which is very good for us." I bet Art and JJ will be mad that Brendon and Rachel didn't spend more time following them when they find out about this. Bopper and Mark are also being told they're going the wrong way and need to turn around.

And after all this, it's Other Rachel and Dave, who not so long ago were in fourth place, who find Simba-A campsite. Near the entrance is a packet of clues sticking out from behind a shield that's hung on spears stuck into the bright-green grass. "Set up camp for the night," Dave reads from one of the clues. And this ain't no KOA, mind you. Parked nearby are some Army trucks filled with materials, which Phil says they'll need to start by unpacking, and then "construct this elaborate safari tent, complete with a working bush shower." It is a very nice tent, which also includes two made-up cots, a large shaded porch with a bamboo mat, director's chairs, a table, a canvas sink and various other amenities. As for the shower, it's a canvas cubicle with a solar water sack hanging overhead. We were going to buy one of those for one of our camping trips many years ago, but as my wife Trash pointed out, "Somebody inevitably pees in it." The rest of us were all like, "How is that inevitable? How is that even likely?" But we've never bought one. She remains convinced. I think she suspects they come from the factory with pee already in it. Phil says they can race to the Pit Stop after they're done. "The last team to check in here--" "here" being a spot on a hilltop with a commanding view for miles around -- "may be eliminated." So does that mean there was no Roadblock this leg or does it mean that there was a Roadblock and it was edited out to show more of the interpersonal drama? I'm sure I could find out, but I don't actually want to know.

Other Rachel and Dave start unloading the heavy gear, wondering where the other teams have gotten to and figuring they went the wrong way. Dave says, "This might be in the deep recesses of my army skill set, so the attention to detail of emulating the model definitely I won't have any problems with that. Especially with my OCD." And I'm sure your OCD will make for a harmonious, peaceful collaboration with your wife too.

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Amazing Race

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