Amazing Race

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Blow, Winds, Blow!

By now, Jet and Cord have found the clue box, and Jet will be doing this Road Block. Jet interviews of Pingping, "If he jumped out of your trash can, it would scare you to death." If not much less demeaning, this remark is at least funnier than Caite's request, "Can I take him home?" Wearing both cowboy hats on the sidelines, Cord remarks that he doesn't know where Pingping shops, "but he wears a small." "This ain't like roping," Jet says, as he struggles almost as much as Caite does. At the same time, I wouldn't advise him to try to bring down a steer with uncooked noodles.

Meanwhile, the other two teams continue to be lost, to the vast frustration of the brothers. And the Detectives don't feel much better about it. "One bad cabdriver could cost you a million dollars," Michael remarks, having completely forgotten that they control their own destiny.

The desperate little caravan pulls over at a desolate parking lot somewhere, which is not the right place, but both teams are satisfied with having found an English-speaking local who can give their cabbies directions to Zhujiajiao in the local language. And according to them, it's only three kilometers away. Back underway, Dan complains, "I feel like I'm in the movie Behind Enemy Lines." That would indeed suck for me, because I've never seen that movie and so would be totally lost, even before Owen Wilson shows up with short hair.

Back at the Road Block, Pingping now has a smoldering length of one-inch PVC pipe dangling from his lips. Oh, wait, it's just a regular-sized cigarette. Think he gets carded when he buys those? From the sidelines, Brent offers Caite some encouragement: "I can't marry you if you can't cook, babe." Is that supposed to make her go faster? Jet, however, has discovered the trick of adding more flour to keep the noodles from sticking together, but with only a hundred grams of noodles in the scale, he's got some work left to do. "Whoop that pasta!" Cord calls from the footbridge. Jet does, risking whooplash.

The other two teams have reached Zhujiajiao, and Brent is telling us that Caite needs to be more gentle with her pasta, like how Jet is doing. "I will never ask her to make homemade spaghetti," Brent confides to us. I'm sure she'll be relieved to hear it. The two trailing teams have found the village and are now reaching the boats. Caite asks for chef-judge approval for some of her noodles, which are just a sticky, tangled mass, to Brent's frustration. Jet, however, is "so close I can taste it." The two late-arriving teams glide by in their gondolas, offering a little mild heckling as they pass. Jet's way ahead of Caite by now. The brothers are the third team to reach the clue box, and Jordan is taking this one. "Let's go, you little noodle master," Dan calls. Louie is going to be taking this one: "I remember helping my grandmother make pasta when I was a kid," he interviews. Now all four teams are here, and Jordan is jealous of Jet's powers of control over seemingly uncontrollable objects. Which must seem doubly impressive to Jordan, as the list of thinking Jordan is unable to control looks as though it will soon include Jordan. Jet finishes first, and Pingping hands him the next clue, nobly refraining from jumping out of a trash can to do so.

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Amazing Race

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