Amazing Race
I Love Monkeys!

Episode Report Card
M. Giant: A- | 1 USERS: C
YOU GRADE IT
Sequesterville Express

So now it's a matter of each team waiting for a monkey to get bold enough to approach a coconut, which is further complicated by passing tourists. One of them starts gnawing at the shell of Dave & Connor's nut and eventually gets inside. Of course, the ape has no interest in handing over a clue and is just enjoying a snack, so they wait until he's done eating and abandons the empty shell. When he does, a ranger in a green shirt and sarong retrieves the spent coconut. Inside is a little metal tube and don't ask me how they got it inside the coconut in the first place. It turns out to contain a rolled-up slip of paper with their next clue, a Detour. Cut to Phil standing in a temple courtyard while wearing a shirt and sarong of his own, explaining that "this Detour requires teams to work with two natural resources that are an essential part of life in Bali." The choice is "Sandy Bottom" or "Fruity Top." Seriously? Oh, my God, I can hear Joey's shrill laughter already.

For "Sandy Bottom," the teams will have to wade into the middle of the Ayung River, and let me tell you right now that if you ever try to use Google Maps to try to locate and check the spelling of a single river in Bali, make sure you empty your bladder first; the whole island looks like a drunk Vulcan's eyeball. As for the racers, they'll have to do something only slightly more difficult: fill baskets with sand from the river bottom, which they will have to carry 200 yards uphill on their heads to the local brick-maker. And it's going to take more than one trip, because they'll have to fill a large container with the stuff. For "Fruity Top," they'll have to construct an almost vertical stack of fruit in a low basket and top it with a little decoration to make what Phil calls "a religious offering known as a [something that Google Maps is even less helpful with spelling-wise]." This item will then have to be carried in a procession to a temple to be blessed by a priest, who will hand them their next clue. Obviously Dave & Connor are doing Fruity Top, because Dave's in no condition to be wading into any rivers, let alone climb their banks while using both hands to balance pounds of sand on his head. That foot would snap right off.

The other two teams are waiting as patiently as they can for their monkeys to mutilate their coconuts already. "Eat faster," Pam says softly. Max remarks how his monkey is scratching its butt and taking a drink, much like himself in the morning. The ranger gets his and Katie's tube out for them, and they decide on Fruity Top. Pam & Winnie make the same choice and so do Caroline and Jennifer, saying they love everything to do with priests and religion. They know this isn't a Christian thing, right?

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Amazing Race

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