At the pit stop, here come Chuck and Millie. Welcome, you are team number five. And also, you suck. Well, half of you sucks. And it's not you, Chuck.
On the train, AirSteve says that while he and Dave aren't completely giving up, they're prepared for the worst. Have you tried the Defeatism Chowder? It's very tasty with crackers.
Al and Jon land on the mat in sixth place.
After a quick check on the "bumming" Russell and Cindy, who fear being last, we see David and Jeff check in as team number seven, and then Phil tells them they have to leave because they're not contestants. They show him ID, and he lets them stay. What's more, David says "sweet" just like Vern when he hears that they're seventh, and Jeff hits him on the pecs like he has no idea what kind of congratulatory ritual would be appropriate. Weirdest. Team. Ever.
AirSteve and Dave and Russell and Cindy are still hurtling along the train tracks.
Kelly and Jon -- who have had a bad, bad leg -- check in as team number eight. Time to start communicating, kids, because you can't afford a repeat of that performance.
Phil at the mat! Who will be next? Who will have their feet pulled out of the fire? Phil POV shot! Shadowy figures! And it's...AirSteve and Dave! Zoiks. These guys are like the Timex of racers. In a very Ken and Gerard manner, they crack up as Phil tries to build suspense around their placement. "You're team number nine," he finally tells them. They chortle in disbelief. They mob Phil. Dave voices over that he and AirSteve want to win, and still believe they can. AirSteve points out in an interview that you always have to keep going, in case something happens to another team that's even worse than what happened to you. (Bitterly known as the Momily Principle.)
Oh, and here come the lovely Russell and Cindy from the train station toward the pit stop. Phil doesn't even try for any suspense as he tells them they're out. Russell interviews that he hates losing. Cindy interviews that the couple of days they spent together were "detrimental" to her and Russell's relationship, because Russell didn't listen to her and couldn't work with her. One hopes that she is finally ordering up that clue, because it is overcooked and waiting to be delivered.
Executive Producer? Jerry Bruckheimer.
Next week: Chuck has a panic attack. People argue, but it's impossible to tell what the heck's going on or how serious it is. Lame preview this week, but that fight is definitely either really important or not important at all.