Amazing Race
If I Were In Town, I Would Ask For Your Number

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Miss Alli: B | 2 USERS: A+
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Knight Of The Sausages

Behind them, here comes Team Guido, but they think they might have gone too far. Mirna and Charla and Eric and Pink all worry that they're lost.

Dustin puts her armor on. Armor fetishists start their engines. Well, actually, they would... stoke their bonfires or something, since engines wouldn't be part of their worldview. Charla and Mirna arrive next, and Mirna is all, "this is a critical moment," she might need to be the one to do it, blah blah. Charla says, however, that she'll do it, because Mirna pretty much forced her hand with the speech in the car. Dustin begins leading the horse, and Charla gets suited up. They do have a suit that fits her, which is interesting. Charla unfortunately has a few problems with this task, which is one of the ones least well suited to her, really. Her height is an issue with being able to lead the horse the way the horse expects. The armor is harder for her to walk in than for many others, because her legs are so short. The horse potentially could go faster than she can, again because her legs are short. There are really a host of reasons this is a bad idea, which is why Mirna maybe should have closed her yap in the car a little sooner.

Dustin and Kandice walk with their horse. Mirna harangues Charla that the horse's problems following are her fault for doing it wrong. I spoke to a friend of mine after this episode who said that this was the first episode of this show that she ever saw, and all she could say was, "I couldn't believe how the one was yelling at the small one!" Indeed.

Eric and Pink and Team Guido arrive at the clue box. Eric takes it, as does Bill. As they get going, Joe (I think) notes that Charla looks like "a dressed-up rat," which I don't dislike for its meanness so much as for its... randomness. I don't know. I don't even get it, really. There's got to be a better line than that, if you're going to mock a little person in a suit of armor. I'm not saying you'd feel good about yourself, but if we're going with "rat" anyway, you know? Mirna is still criticizing everything Charla does, telling her that she's doing it wrong, the horse is confused, and on and on and on. I think even the horse is tired of listening, and I keep thinking he's going to start cooperating just so she'll settle down.

Dustin and Kandice make their way to the mat, finished with the horse task. Welcome, you are team number three. They hug, with Dustin still in her armor. Hee hee.

Teams lead horses. Everyone's experience is peaceful, except that Mirna is yelling at Charla the entire time. And then... Charla tips over. Which is funny, but it would be funny if it were anybody, because the armor kind of makes you a plank capable of falling directly on your face, so don't assume we're all going to hell, necessarily. Besides, nobody's getting hurt, because it's armor. There is more walking, and there are more horses, and then just as Mirna and Charla get finished, Charla tips over again. Mirna at least seems concerned this time. Charla and Mirna do make it to the mat next, though, so they check in as team number four. And then Bill gallops adorably to the mat in his armor. He and Joe are the fifth team to arrive, but... they have to wait out a half-hour penalty. And as you can imagine, the half-hour penalty is... not happening, as far as Eric and Pink taking longer than that.

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Amazing Race

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