Amazing Race
I'm Going To Jail

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Miss Alli: B- | Grade It Now!
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Officer, we're not with him

I'm sorry, my head just exploded from him being such an enormous tool. Wait while I clean up. I mean, yes, that's a real expression. But there's no way that a couple of guys who probably deal with tourists constantly haven't just about had it up to here with people whose entire Swahili vocabulary consists of "hakuna matata." It's like if every tourist who came to the United States had a vocabulary consisting of "Show me the money!" About the third time I heard it, blood would be spilled.

Okay. Exploded head is all cleaned up. Anyway, the guys behind the counter prepare to call their boss, while back at the airport, the teams speculate about what's happening to Colin. Chip, not sure whether to be amused or alarmed at the mess Colin has sunk himself into, says he certainly wouldn't get into it with the police over fifty dollars. Yeah. We saw the twenty-dollar tip, sweetheart. We know. Chip speculates that "the team that's going to destroy Colin and Christie, that's Colin and Christie." And oh, amen to that.

Back at the station, Colin and Christie stand outside talking, and he makes the preposterous statement, "This would be so much easier if you weren't making it so difficult." She calmly asks what exactly she's doing that's making it difficult. She points out that nothing has even happened since she got there, so she certainly hasn't changed the circumstances for the worse. She says she hasn't done anything but share her opinion that it's a waste of time. Finally, Sam Manhalwa, the officer who runs the station, arrives. Colin introduces himself. The boss asks what's up with the hundred dollars, and Colin says that he only ever promised a hundred dollars if they arrived in the same order in which they left. Again, I suspect that at some point, he said something like that. But again, that's a totally different argument from "it's unsafe," and changing your argument is always a sign that something is amiss. But at any rate, Colin goes on to explain that the spare tire blew out on the ride when they hit a bump. Then, already losing his temper again after obviously trying to start out with Sam on the right foot, Colin says sharply with an abundance of hand gestures that leaving on a two-hour trip (he says "two-hour journey," actually, which is kind of dorky) with a spare tire on the car is a stupid move. Which is true. "How much would you like to pay him?" Sam asks, fairly clearly offering Colin his intervention as a mediator. I thought it was abundantly obvious at that moment that Sam agreed in part with Colin, and would have tried to get him twenty dollars off or something. Colin, however, responds in exactly the wrong way, by again snapping, "He can have 50, or he can have nothing." I firmly believe that if he had said, "I'll pay him 50; I think 50 is fair," he would probably have ultimately walked away at 75.

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Amazing Race

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