Amazing Race
I'm Gonna Take His Girl

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: B- | 1 USERS: A+
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There's nothing like a clean elephant

7:23 AM. Thunk. One of them brilliantly voices over that when they stop making mistakes, they'll do better in the race. Boy, what they lack in wit, they certainly make up for in stupidity. Anyway, now we cut to Gary and Dave's interview footage, and -- oh, for the love of all that is -- what is this? Gary is in an earflap hat. No, really -- an earflap hat. It's sort of greenish-black, vaguely condom-like, and features a logo on the front that I refuse to attempt to decode. It's probably the crest of The International Society Of Funeral Directors For Dead-On-Arrival One-Liners, since I suspect he speaks at all their conventions. Dave is wearing a red bandanna. Now we enter into our special feature of the day, "Gary And Dave Dis The Other Teams: A Study In Glass Houses And Stone-Throwing." Over footage of Wil and Tara de-boating, Thunk says that Taraweasel is a strong team, but Tara wants to be friends with people more than she wants to win. Dave thinks Thunk can use that to their advantage. I think Dave might be thinking of another show, like Survivor or something. I might need to send him a telegram reminding him what show he's on.

The Teeth, followed by Thunk themselves, de-boat and grab cabs for Bangkok. In one moment I particularly like, Blake seems to be looking at something (a book of some kind), and trying to figure out something about what it says, and then he slowly turns it upside-down and tries again. That was cute. When the Teeth are in their cab, Blake explains that the guy said "market flowers," so they're hoping that means he knows where he's going. Dave yells at Thunk's driver to go faster, and Gary asks him to calm down. Ah, Gary. The voice of reason. And he's in his camo hat, too, so he's certainly at his most irresistible. Over footage of Blake and Paige, Gary says that "Team Smiley," as he calls them, is "weak," because "they've never had to fight for anything in their whole world, except maybe their sorority slots." Well, I'm pretty sure Blake didn't fight for a sorority slot, but I guess when you're Gary, you do what you can. Anyway, (THUNK). Dave says the Teeth are "children" and that Thunk will "step all over them when [they] need to." Blake, meanwhile, jury-rigs a diagram of the cross-streets they're looking for, looks up the word for "market," and has Paige draw a flower. Because a guy can't draw a flower without lowering his sperm count, I suppose. Although this does qualify as one of Blake's Wacky Schemes, I have to say that it's one of his better ones, since it's not necessarily doomed to failure before he even begins.

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Amazing Race

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