Amazing Race
I'm Not A Miner! No, You're An Idiot!, Part I

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Shop Till You Drop

The Teeth approach Murray House at long last. Blake thinks the dragon boat sounds like a pain in the ass, so they pick up the lion and take off. It looks like Paige has no vote regarding what Detour they take at all -- Blake just looks at the boat clue and says, "Nah, I don't like that," and it's on to the lion. For a guy who admires his sister so much, he doesn't seem to listen to her very often. Anyway, once they're inside the belly of the beast (literally), they do just fine, but frankly there's no way they're having as much fun as Oswald and Danny. Of course, nobody really has as much fun as Oswald and Danny, so what are you going to do?

Gary and Dave are headed for the airport, and they, like Cha-Cha-Cha, decide to stop and try to make a phone call to work on flights before they get there. They ask for the first flight from Bangkok to Sydney. I'm not sure why they think they have to connect through Bangkok, but apparently they think they do.

The Teeth, still humorlessly hauling the lion.

Oswald gets himself and Danny on standby for a flight, and then they thank their friendly host and take off again. Once again, now that they've at least secured standby, they intend to get themselves to a good hotel and talk to the concierge to see what they can do about getting in touch with a travel agency. Not only do they think this will net them a better flight, but they also don't want to deal with "the masses and the chaos" at the airport. Considering how hectic all the airport crap always looks, I have to think they've made a very wise choice there. Cha-Cha-Cha takes their fabulous selves and scoots to the Mandarin Oriental hotel, which is the same place they got directions early in the morning. On their way there, they pass Gary and Dave on the sidewalk, where they are on the phone working on flights. As they go by, the teams exchange greetings, and Dave asks Oswald whether they're making reservations. "No," Oswald answers, barely slowing down. When they're gone, Dave calls them "smug bastards," which would really piss me off, except that I'm pretty sure it was a compliment, given that Dave follows it up with a very sincere, "They scare me." Heh. Gary allows that perhaps Cha-Cha-Cha "knows something much more" than Thunk does. Oh, for cryin' out loud, let me count the ways.

Blake and Paige finish the Detour and grab the Sydney clue. As they try to catch a cab, Blake says he "can't bear" the thought of missing a good flight "'cause of one mistake." Well, yes, dearie, but that's how this race works, especially at the end. You're on your toes all the time, or you're out, out, out. In the grand tradition of Esquire dumping a couple of old ladies onto the Parisian pavement, the Teeth manage to appropriate a cab from its rightful passenger and take off. Incidentally, Blake tells the evictee that she's "a god," so apparently false idols (Buddha, for instance) are bad, but employing religious imagery to butter up those you've just taken advantage of? That's perfectly fine.

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Amazing Race

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