Amazing Race
I’m Supposed To Be Indebted To Her For The Rest Of The Race?!

Episode Report Card
admin: A | 2 USERS: A+
Flights of fancy, flats of fate

Asshat makes note of the tire situation. "He's got a flat," Teri gloats. Good observation, Teri! Meanwhile, the Bald Snark are proceeding very slowly, and Gerard looks back to see who it is they have trapped behind them. "Oh, it's Ian!" he says, and cracks up. He and Kenny both laugh hysterically at the fact that they're accidentally foiling everyone's anti-favorite team. "Let's just go reeeally slow, then," Kenny says. Ian does eventually zip around and pass them. Kenny gives a wave, but as they go by, he hisses, "Dirty rotten scoundrels!" Heh. Gerard is ready to pull over with their abused tire for fear they'll ruin the rim.

Elsewhere, Derek and Drew seem to be finding their way to the pit stop at last, while Teri and Ian have pulled over to sweat directions. "If we went that way..." Ian begins. "No, we didn't go that way," Teri corrects. They go inside somewhere to ask directions.

Circus Music Of Goofy Happenings plays as a laughing Ken and Gerard pull into what looks like a tiny little gas station. Their tire? Oh, it is shredded. And when I say shredded, we're talking shredded. Like shredded wheat. Like shredded cheese. Like a Ryan Starr shirt. Shredded. They both laugh as they lead the guy out to the car to take a look. "We have a problem," they say. The guy is very impressed with what they've managed to do to the tire. I have to say, it's the worst-looking tire I've ever seen that's still attached to the wheel. Normally, you only see those in pieces on the highway.

At Neuschwanstein Castle, Derek and Drew, who supposedly can't navigate their way out of a paper bag, arrive first. They run and land on the mat. Welcome, boys, you are team number two. They high-five. A good leg for them, and they deserve a lot of credit for being the champs of what looks like it was a pretty tough navigation sequence.

Just behind them, a hustling Jill and John Vito hop out. Yay! Welcome, Jill and John Vito, you are team number three. And you are, I would point out, the only team who will have a Fast Forward available after this point. Not bad. That will make the calculus of when it's most advantageous to go for it a lot less complicated.

A helpful fellow removes the spare tire from under Ken and Gerard's SUV. They applaud. He puts the tire on for them.

Asshat arrives at the castle. They step on the mat. And this is seriously the funniest Phil moment of all time (it won't be for long, but it is for now). If you look at Phil's face as he welcomes them to the mat, he literally makes this little face like he's going to throw up. He says, "Teri and Ian," and then he makes the face. I have my TiVo paused on the face right now, as I write this. And the face says, "I have just eaten bad shrimp." Only it's not bad shrimp, it's just Teri and Ian. He tells them they're team number four. But Phil knows the truth.

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Amazing Race




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