A very pessimistic Gerard is sure as they approach the castle that they're going to be sent home. Ken tells him not to talk that way. "You gotta be in it to win it, Gerard, we're not givin' up yet." "Listen, Maria Von Trapp," Gerard snaps, "that's your fantasy world. We're hours behind." They talk about their fear of elimination as they park at the castle. They run across the field toward the mat, half-laughing. "Phil!" Kenny yells. And then he mutters, still running, "Oh, he's too serious." Phil fixes Ken and Gerard with the hardest, coldest, most depressing stare he can muster. "Ken and Gerard," he says in a dark tone. They look back at him. And then, as I have been waiting to see someone do ever since Phil got so out of control with the dramatic pauses, they completely crack up. They just dissolve in giggles. "Lay it on us, Phil," Gerard says. "You're team...number five," Phil delivers flatly. Ken and Gerard turn to each other, and -- you guessed it: "YAAAY!" They hug and laugh. Gerard waves his fists at the sky. "We're alive!" he yells. Damn, they are too cute. They are right up there with my favorite adorable teams of all time -- so naturally funny, and such enthusiastic guys, and such good racers. They'll probably come in fourth, I suppose.
Firecop, in Innsbruck at last. They approach Annasaule. When they get there, they find a clue that sends them directly to the pit stop. Not good news, fellas. They get to the castle, and as they take their bags out of the back of the car, Damon comments that he can hear the fat lady singing right now. They step to the mat, and to no one's surprise (particularly their own), they are Philiminated. Andre says that he hopes that their experience on the show will teach people that cops and firefighters are just regular people, and that that will help bridge the gap between law enforcement and the community. A nice thought. I'm afraid the gap is likely to be a little more resilient than that, but it's a nice thought. Andre then says he has something to give to Phil. He reaches inside his jacket and pulls out the one dollar they got for the leg, which still looks crisp and lovely. "We didn't need it," he says, laughing. Oh, good move. I liked that. Congratulations, Firecop, on a nice exit.
Executive Producer? Jerry Bruckheimer.
Next week: Everyone hates Ian. Everyone wonders what the hell is up with Flo and Zach. Teri's pants are falling down. It's madness, I tell you -- madness!