Amazing Race
Amazing Race

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: A | 552 USERS: C+
YOU GRADE IT
We Open in Venice

Amanda and Chris are fuckin' getting in the fuckin' raft. Sorry, force of habit. They fly down the hill. AAAAAAAAH! They reach the bottom and tear open the clue. You can hear Amanda add that the clue also says, "You may not fly at any time," so apparently, it must be theoretically possible to get from Cortina to Venice by air. Interesting.

Back at the top of the hill, Josh is most unamusingly hamming it up with DadSteve about impending doom as they get ready to go. They go down the hill, both exhibiting what I guess is the de rigueur behavior during this task, which is holding your fist directly over your head and going, "Wooo!" It's sort of the double-axel of snow rafting, I guess -- nothing special, but if you don't do it, you just haven't completed the experience. Reach bottom, read clue.

The Sister-Kissers reunite and find a hotel where Josh asks, "What's the fastest way to Venice?" The hotel guy tells them that the fastest way would be from Calalzo (which is generally true, but not true right now). The alliance hops into taxis and goes to the train station at Calalzo, where they finally look at a schedule and discover that there are no trains for quite a while. Millie opines that the other teams are going to catch up to them while they're waiting for a train. Well, yes, dear. Have you seen the show? ["No, she was too busy not having sex with her boyfriend of twelve years to watch the past three seasons." -- Wing Chun]

12:49 AM. Monica and Sheree open their clue. Monica explains in an interview that although she and Sheree have certain luxuries as a result of being married to professional athletes, they're on the race to prove that they're actually strong women who can take care of themselves. And, of course, they can commence proving it any time now. Unlike the Sister-Kissers, who walked from the mat to the bottom of the ski hill, by the way, Monica and Sheree choose to cab it. They also appear to be going with the full-on matching outfits, which just really is too much, especially since they have the same hair. It's like Guido, if Bill had been a blond. And they'd been married to NFL players. Actually, that would have been cool.

1:05 AM. Dave and AirSteve. Dave sounds like he says they have seven dollars for the leg, but I think it must be seventy, because AirSteve is counting the money, and he does seem to have twenties. Still, it's quite a drop from last week. They, too, call for a cab to the hill. AirSteve voices over that Dave's knee is hurting, and they both need to "get a little gas back in [their] tanks." Dude. It's the end of the first leg. I know it was physical, but...sheesh. I've seen twenty-seven-foot SUVs with side-mounted grenade launchers and indoor plumbing that didn't run out of gas that fast.

Amazing Race

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