Amazing Race
It Doesn't Say Anything About First Come, First Served. And We're Bigger.

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: A | 1 USERS: A+
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We Open in Venice

The Sister-Kissers reunite and find a hotel where Josh asks, "What's the fastest way to Venice?" The hotel guy tells them that the fastest way would be from Calalzo (which is generally true, but not true right now). The alliance hops into taxis and goes to the train station at Calalzo, where they finally look at a schedule and discover that there are no trains for quite a while. Millie opines that the other teams are going to catch up to them while they're waiting for a train. Well, yes, dear. Have you seen the show? ["No, she was too busy not having sex with her boyfriend of twelve years to watch the past three seasons." -- Wing Chun]

12:49 AM. Monica and Sheree open their clue. Monica explains in an interview that although she and Sheree have certain luxuries as a result of being married to professional athletes, they're on the race to prove that they're actually strong women who can take care of themselves. And, of course, they can commence proving it any time now. Unlike the Sister-Kissers, who walked from the mat to the bottom of the ski hill, by the way, Monica and Sheree choose to cab it. They also appear to be going with the full-on matching outfits, which just really is too much, especially since they have the same hair. It's like Guido, if Bill had been a blond. And they'd been married to NFL players. Actually, that would have been cool.

1:05 AM. Dave and AirSteve. Dave sounds like he says they have seven dollars for the leg, but I think it must be seventy, because AirSteve is counting the money, and he does seem to have twenties. Still, it's quite a drop from last week. They, too, call for a cab to the hill. AirSteve voices over that Dave's knee is hurting, and they both need to "get a little gas back in [their] tanks." Dude. It's the end of the first leg. I know it was physical, but...sheesh. I've seen twenty-seven-foot SUVs with side-mounted grenade launchers and indoor plumbing that didn't run out of gas that fast.

At the hill, Monica and Sheree are ready to go. AAAAAAAAAH! Their screams, like their clothes, are well-coordinated. They also execute the double-axel, only they do it holding hands to grab an added tenth of a point for the level of difficulty. They'll still probably have to share the medal with the Canadians.

As AirSteve and Dave approach the hill, they spot all the lights and stuff and Dave comments, "This is too cool." I appreciate the moxie, but still worry about the joints. If you're quiet, you can hear their bones creaking.

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Amazing Race

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