Amazing Race
It's a Great Place to Become a Millionaire

Episode Report Card
M. Giant: B | 2 USERS: A
YOU GRADE IT
Stumbling Toward Ecstasy

A two-hour finale always feels like spending a week cramming for a final. But at least I've been to all the classes this semester.

The pre-credits recap of the season so far is oddly heavy on alliteration. And also oddly heavy on Bopper and Mark, considering Team Kentucky isn't even in the race any more. They lasted so long it's easy to forget that they ultimately came in fifth out of eleven teams. But then the Amazing Editors make up for it with a high-speed montage of Rachel's many crying tantrums all over the world, as Phil narrates that she and Brendon "felt the pressure of the race early -- and often." It's interesting to learn that she always cries in the same key, though.

After the opening titles, which feature a half-dozen or more ex-racers I don't even remember any more, Phil starts out the episode proper by telling us that Cochin, India is known as the city of harmony, which explains why all the teams have been getting along so well. We're reintroduced to the giant Chinese fishing nets on the shoreline, a location that Phil reminds us is the start of the eleventh leg. Because Other Rachel and Dave won the previous leg, as usual, they're leaving first -- this time at 1:51 PM. After they rip their clue, they'll take a flight of nearly 4,000 miles to Hiroshima, Japan and then get themselves to Miyajima Island to receive their next clue. Dave interviews that winning is important, but his relationship with Other Rachel is more important. From what we've seen all season, it seems like achievement of the one is necessary for the survival of the other. They head into a travel agency and as Other Rachel sits down across from one of the many travel agents behind the counter, Dave orders Other Rachel, "You work that to completion." I think she was going to, Major. The agent asks her how his country is and she says they love it, it's very nice. "Rachel, please don't distract, let him work," Dave dicks at his wife for politely answering a question. He interviews that he doesn't see Other Rachel as his wife, but as his equal and as his teammate and his peer, while Other Rachel keeps correcting, "soldier" until Dave finally agrees. I was going to say "piss-boy," but I'll allow it. They learn that they'll be getting into Hiroshima at 8:10 tomorrow night and that's the earliest flight available. In other words, everyone is going to be on the same plane, as usual. Yes, Other Rachel, the producers obviously work very hard to make that happen. Try to keep up.

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Amazing Race

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