Amazing Race
It's Hammer Time

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Miss Alli: B+ | Grade It Now!
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Goodbye, honeys

But wait…not everybody has taken to the highway. Wil and Tara are looking at the Fast Forward. You'll recall that they're the only ones who are eligible to take it, which makes the FF even more appealing because they can do it without any risk that they'll be beaten to it by somebody else. In other words, all other things being equal, if you assume you're going to use your FF at some point and it doesn't matter that much when you use it, there's a good argument for using it after everybody else uses theirs. Phil's Fast Forward Tutorial ensues. He explains that the FF this week sends them to Mount Tarawera, where they'll do a long hike, followed by a downhill scree run. What's a scree run? Well, it's a run down into a dormant volcano. You'll need a near-vertical hill of loose volcanic rock, your running shoes, and your girliest scream. I like the idea of Wil and Tara doing this FF, and am disappointed only by the word "dormant." They decide it is indeed most advantageous to go for it, so they ask for directions to the mountain.

Driving. "No mistakes," Blake says. "We knew exactly the way to go, we didn't even hesitate," Paige says insufferably. God, shut UP. Could they be any more fond of themselves? If they had lockers, they'd have their own pictures up in them. In the Boston Camper, Alex updates us that Blake and Paige are in front of them, and Danny and Oswald are behind them. Cha-Cha-Cha decides that this little caravan is going the wrong direction, and they turn around and go the other way. Chris and Alex see this, and Chris pronounces it "messed up." Oswald says he thinks that Chris and Alex are going the wrong way, which Danny finds a very funny example of shifting fortunes. Apparently, Boston turns around eventually as well, now winding up behind Danny and Oswald. I think what happened here, in case you're confused, is that the whole little group reached a turn, and Blake and Paige took the right one, and initially Boston and Cha-Cha-Cha both took the wrong one, and then all this turning around happened. That's what makes the most sense, I believe.

Wil and Tara are on their way to Mount Tarawera. When they get there, she tells him to drive the 4x4 that's waiting for them. No, really. She tells him to drive it. I'm sure the poor vehicle has heard from SUVs all over the world, and therefore is cringing at the very thought of being driven by Wil. "Nooooo!" it is crying in its sad little voice. "Wil's driving, never a good sign," Tara says when they're on their way, which would be understandable if she hadn't told him to drive, I suppose. They arrive at the top of the mountain and tackle the lengthy hike. When they spot the scree run, she gives a hearty "Oh, my God!" and frankly, I don't blame her.

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Amazing Race

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