Amazing Race

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Those Who Red the Clue and Those Who Blue It

Ken and Tina are arriving at the Road Block, and quickly decide that Ken's doing it. He pelts into the park like the ex-footballer he is, quickly becoming a human rainbow. Ken climbs his ladder. Outside, Christy's waving cash money around in the air, yelling in all directions for a taxi. "Do we look that bad?" she asks rhetorically. Sometimes this is what it takes for a white person to realize how hard it can be to get a cab for people of color.

Tina's yelling instructions to Ken, telling him to look for the clue. "What do you think I'm looking for?" he yells back from the top of his ladder, and then we hear her yelling, "No! Stop it!" That's because she's been encircled by kids throwing yellow and green dye at her. "Oh, you stupid assholes," she says, all unbleeped during the family hour (football delay notwithstanding). She even pushes a guy, who just laughs at her as though he doesn't hear the shocked musical cue that accompanies potential international incidents on this show. "What a bunch of morons," she mutters as she wipes her face off. Her hair, however, will be a uniform kelly-green for the duration of this leg. Which is ironic, considering how many colors Kelly's hair is right now.

Speaking of whom, Kelly has decided to hail a cab Grand Theft Auto style, running up to a moving taxi and grabbing onto the side. Even so, it drives away as soon as she lets go. Christy's expression of righteous indignation burns through the pink. Or maybe it amplifies it. Hard to tell.

Ken returns to his green-haired wife with the clue, and she rushes him along instead of letting him rinse off, reasonably enough. They get back in their cab as Tina mildly asks him, "How do you like my green hair?" This is the first time a disoriented Ken has noticed it, as Kelly and Christy finally, apologetically, get into a cab. Ken tells Tina he's sorry she got "all messed up," but she's over it already. "I got too close," she says, and he gives her a grateful kiss for trying to help him out. Aw. What a sweet separated-and-hideously-stained couple.

And Kelly and Christy are upset about the way Delhi has treated their multicolored selves. "Nobody would make eye contact," says Kelly. "No, they acted like we didn't exist," Christy agrees. We are Americans! In India! Attention must be paid! Basically, Toni and Sarah were the only ones who got away clean. And Phil, of course. Always Phil.

Nick and Starr have arrived at the Bird Hospital, which requires them to remove their socks and shoes in observance of the fact that they're entering a Jain temple. On their way into the building, they spot the giant Speed Bump sign with Ken and Tina's photo pasted on it. They don't seem too heartbroken on their allies' behalf. Once inside, they find themselves in a narrow hallway lined with cages on each side. Nick interviews that he wasn't clear on whether this was a hospital for birds or a hospital that used birds, but either way he wasn't crazy about walking through it barefoot. The floors look plenty clean to me, but then so do those in a lot of public bathrooms. It doesn't seem to take them too long to find the clue in one of the smaller cages. Their choices are "Bleary Eyed" or "Teary Eyed."

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Amazing Race

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