Amazing Race
Phil Is A Choo-Choo Charlie

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Miss Alli: B- | Grade It Now!
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Over And Over, They'll Be A Fool For You

Don and MJ check in last, but they are non-eliminated. Yay!

Remember the slavery monument? Yeah, that was sad. We watch Gus again, giving the Emmy speech, but we now get to see a very interesting Hera interview as well, in which she talks about her extensive thoughts during the race about "what it means to carry an American passport." And you can tell that she has been through a few rounds of "Wow, people really hate us," and knows that her passport has a few meanings other than "Woooo!" She says that she was reminded at the monument of what other people had to endure in order for her to be able to grow up as an American. "I come from everything that America is," she says. "And part of America is the ugliness of slavery." Amen to that, my dear. She is just a lovely person. It's so weird how this season has delivered the biggest dickweeds ever, but also some of the really nicest folks in quite some time.

And now, in a scene so funny it could be from a Robert Altman movie, Spazpants adopts another African local to help them, and it turns out that this guy has an agenda. He undoubtedly sees the cameras and the production, and it appeals to him. And why? Because, like half of the rest of the people on the planet Earth, he has written a movie. And he wants Jonathan to...I don't know, read it? Take it back to Hollywood? Whatever. Anyway, Jonathan asks the guy what his movie is about. The guy, speaking English with an accent that's fairly difficult to penetrate, informs Jonathan that the movie is about "common value we have in us." He gestures to a little girl, saying it's about her, and how she was told, "Go and never come back." Jonathan takes all of this in. "So...it's about a dog? A dog?" "No, man," the guy tells him. That was awesome. It would have been better if the guy had punched him in the mouth, but you can't have everything.

Remember "breeding and breeding"? Yeah, we're all kind of trying to forget that part, because in a lot of ways, it's seriously disgusting. "She needs to go work in a foreign country for a couple of years," says Miss Alli's Dad as this clip runs again, "and maybe she'd straighten up." Right on, Daddy-O.

Not that anyone is suggesting you observe the direct contrast between people who completely suck and people who completely rock or anything, but we move directly from Kendra's gross "breeding" remarks to Kris and Jon, who are hanging out on the beach during their down time in Africa. "It's beautiful out here," he comments. They snuggle out in the water. Before you get too "chicka-wocka" about it, there is also wholesome family fun, as we watch little kids jumping into what looks like a shallow little lagoon, and then watch Kris walking in the water as one hangs onto her back. Awww. She laughs with the kids as she voices over that she has spent some time studying Africa, so it "holds a very special place in [her] heart." And then another kid jumps on with the first kid, and Kris swims with both of them hanging on, just like you would in your neighborhood pool. Gee, do you think she brought any candy? As kids flock around her, she explains that she loved hanging out with them. Her boyfriend, unsurprisingly, is having a "Damn, damn, damn" moment as he marvels at Kris's ease in the unfamiliar surroundings. And, of course, at how hot she is. And seriously, who doesn't look hot frolicking with little kids? It's kind of weird, but it's true. Jon explains that he's learning a lot about Kris, and they're getting to spend time together in a way they haven't been able to before, and in one of my favorite shots, just as it starts to look like he's off to the side watching while she does all the interacting, he drifts into the shot, also with a little girl hanging onto his back. "She's amazing," Jon says of Kris. My goodness, they are delightful.

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Amazing Race

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