Amazing Race

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Press For Success

Nick and Starr are still debating their options when Toni and Dallas arrive, now in second place. Both teams decide to do Launder Clothes. In the cab to the laundry, the camera oddly zooms in on Nick's neck as Starr remarks, "Dallas and Toni caught up to us fast." Little does she know that Dallas is now tracking her all across the city using his advanced potential-poontang radar. All guys his age have it.

Ken and Tina appear to be hung up and/or lost again. "We should have got another cab driver," Tina mutters. But why? This one is so good at waiting! In fact, look at him waiting right now!

Andrew and Dan disembark their cab, which is just like the one Andrew just finished painting. At the clue box, they're spotted by Team Divorced, who rush in saying, "We can beat Dandrew." "I don't want to get confused with money," Kelly says after they've read the clue, and Christy agrees, so they're off to iron. The Frat Boys come to the same conclusion, but in their cab, they're bitter about Team Divorced. "They've gotten the luckiest breaks I've ever seen on this race," Dan complains. "I mean being two semi-attractive females, that's helped them a lot." Andrew chuckles at Dan's rapier wit. Okay, I'm certainly not the biggest booster of Team Divorced, but I can't recall any instances of them getting a leg up, if you'll pardon the expression, because of their looks. They're generally quite fast when they're not lost or screwing themselves somehow, and in fact one of their most effective motivators seems to be what I call their "oops-we-just-fucked-up" panic, which they are able to draw on with impressive frequency. As opposed to the Frat Boys, who make fewer and less spectacular mistakes but continue to be held back by their tendency to slog through tasks, fall behind in traffic, and drag a general aura of loserdom around behind themselves like a cartoon rain cloud.

Sarah has finally finished painting her cab, and Terence is so proud of her he even lets her rip the clue. "Open it, you deserve it," he says magnanimously. What a gentleman. Off they go to the Ambassador Hotel, while their poor cab driver has to listen to them argue about how that went. Terence doesn't want to talk about it, and Sarah agrees. "We've never, ever, ever been in last place," she comments instead.

Nick and Starr get to the laundry and run inside to watch the demonstration. Even the wooden handles of the irons are hot, so they dig gloves out of their backpacks to protect their hands. It's worth mentioning that the women who work here and do this for a living are doing it bare-handed. We hear Starr remark that according to the clue, they need to do a total of 20 pieces, which may be the total amount of laundry items I've ironed in the past twenty years. Last Christmas, M. Edium got a set of toy domestic implements from a relative, and he was excited about each of them ("A broom! A mop! A vacuum cleaner!") until he got to the iron and ironing board, which just made him ask, "What's that?" We were so busted. Anyway, back in India, the laundry woman who's assessing their work is clearly not letting them slack through this. It's like she saw the episode years ago where the teams had to "perform" a German folk dance but got to totally flail their way through it, and she thought to herself, "Man, that is some bullshit. If I ever get to judge one of these Detours, shit's going to get done."

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Amazing Race

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