Best! Edit! EVER! We are now in The City Of Utter Irrelevance, in The Great State Of Denial. Smash cut to frozen tundra. Snow-covered mountains. Whistling wind. Barking dogs. Weeping-thumping music. Teeeeeeeam Guido! They're waiting to take off in their dogsled, and they open a piece of route information. Bill reads it out loud: "Rob and Brennan have crossed the finish line." They look stricken, and then they try smiling. It doesn't work terribly well. "Congratulations," Bill says. He's sad, of course, but he's trying. He also declares himself "happy they won," and I think that compared to Frank and Margarita, it might be true.
Bill expounds on his relationship with Joe and how it was "enhanced" by the race. "It proved that everything we knew about each other was true." Oh, really? How frightening. (I kid the Guidos. Now that I know they didn't win? They hardly bother me at all. They did make excellent antagonists.) "It enhanced everything about our relationship," he says. Mm hmm. Fine. They ride the dogsleds on an anti-victory lap. Snowmobile Boy and I had actually discussed this -- whether, if you're told that you lost and you're in the middle of Alaska, they just drive off in their production trucks and leave you there. "Bye! Thanks for being on our show!" It appears not. I wonder if they still had to jump in the ice water in their undies before Jerry Bruckheimer would take them home.
Back at the finish line, there is lots of hugging. Margarita voices over: "It became so clear that it was this trip that was the fresh start for us. And that was when, like, we started making the real steps, building something new, and sort of falling in love again." Frank: "I say Rob and Brennan may have won a million dollars, but I think we won a whole lot more." Aww.