Money for nothing, and your wedding for free
Having chatted up the food adequately, Rob and Amber and Colin speed off in a little golf cart to scope out the reception site. They like the site, but the really big news is that Rob is driving, and almost manages to get everyone killed. It occurs to me that while I wouldn't want him for my actual boyfriend, I think I'd enjoy having him as my friend's boyfriend. Although none of my friends would have him, which might be a problem. ["I'd take that bullet for you, but given the recap I'm interrupting, it's a little late, probably." -- Sars] Interestingly, as they continue wandering, Rob suddenly interviews that he really likes the fact that Colin seems "in tune" with the kind of wedding he and Amber want. It's related to what I was thinking about Colin, in the sense that it's the opposite of what I was thinking, which was that Colin is rejecting the kind of wedding Rob and Amber want. But that's not important right now, because Colin takes them to a stretch of beach that they happily accept as a wedding site, with Amber commenting that after all, they met and fell in love on a beach in the first place, so it makes sense they'd get married there. I can think of so very many people who would not want to follow that philosophy. Although if they did, a lot more weddings would take place in bars, and that could only be good. Rob also thinks it would be grand to ride a jet ski up onto the beach at the wedding. Amber thinks maybe not. She is such a stick in the mud, not wanting him to break his collarbone during the processional. But she's generally feeling "like a bride," adding, "It's not a dream anymore. It's coming true." Aw.
Oh, yeah. There's going to be a little "aw." You should get ready now. It's a wedding. It has "aw." Shut up.
But first, there's going to be a visit to Amber's hometown of Beaver (tee hee), Pennsylvania. Do you suppose they're tired of the jokes yet? I bet not. I bet they cannot get enough beaver jokes there in Beaver, Pennsylvania. As it turns out, Rob and Amber are driving into town for a visit because Amber is having her dress designed by a woman named Arlette, a friend of the family, which is pretty cool. You've got to think a lot of people wanted to make Amber's dress, and the fact that she went with a hometown lady speaks well of her, I think. It turns out that Arlette is Amber's mom's best friend and has known Amber her entire life. My mother doesn't have any dressmaking best friends, but if she did, this is what I'd like to think I would do. Colin interviews with some obvious trepidation that he's never worked with anyone quite like Arlette before, and this is a good time for Colin to suck it, I think. If Amber wants Arlette, I say her wedding planner can bite down on his elitist tut-tutting long enough for them to her to have the dress she wants.