Rob and Sheila are a middle-aged couple, and they're "engaged, from Pigeon Forge, Tennessee." Over footage of him starring in what looks like a lumberjack cabaret show, Rob boasts about his "lumberjack sports career" beginning at the age of six, leading to multiple world championships by the time he was 17. Sheila, on the other hand, walked away from a fifteen-year career at a large but unnamed cosmetics company when Rob proposed. "Rob is definitely the boss of this relationship," she says. "In fact Rob has taken over the planning of the wedding. I just hope he picks me out a really cute dress." If that's the only thing she's worried about, she isn't worried enough.
Next are "Gary and Will, substitute teachers and best friends for 35 years." As for their state of origin, Phil lets their Michigan t-shirts do the talking. We see a montage of their past audition videos, each goofier than the last, as Gary (the tall, Brian Posehn-looking one) says they've applied to be on the race seven times, and they're the show's biggest fans. Not for nothing, but Gary is six foot six and Will is five-foot-one, which makes them a bit of a spectacle. "One and a quarter," Will corrects Gary. Gary says they've been called Mutt and Jeff and Mr. Roark and Tattoo (okay, that one's kind of funny), but they don't care. Will claims if they don't win he'll get a divorce. "From him." Will really wants to be the funny one, it looks like.
Abbie and Ryan pause for a kiss between stepping off the bus and running for the starting line, as Phil says they're "dating divorcees from San Diego, California." That worked out well for last season's Ralph and Vanessa, didn't it? Abbie tells us she's a dance instructor/choreographer, while Ryan says that as a jujitsu instructor, he's more competitive than anyone else in the world. "I want world domination. I want to be bowed down to." Abbie rolls her eyes and says, "Oh, God," which is the only possible response whether he's being serious or not.
This kind of team is the bane of a recapper's existence: James and Jaymes. How am I going to tell them apart? Wait for the dark-haired one to call the bleach-blond one by his name? That's no help. Anyway, they're Chippendales dancers, which I have to admit is a damn good hook. Of course this pair will never be as well-known as the most famous Chippendale duo ever, which would be Patrick Swayze and Chris Farley, but they have the advantage of being for real. The blond one says they're in a "production show" where he sings and the other plays guitar, so they don't just rip their shirts off. The other one promises that they'll be willing bust out the collars and cuffs if need be. Since he's saying this in an interview while they're both wearing them without shirts, I'm thinking they're going to see a pretty low threshold for that particular need.