At camp, Bolo and Lori do a little rassling for the crowd. "I love Lori more than I ever loved anybody in my whole life," Bolo says. Which is nice, since they're married. If there were some other chick he liked better, that would be too bad, and if Lori found out, she would rip some things off his body that he probably likes. He says that they love to just "have a blast." They certainly love to throw each other around, I'll say that for them. They especially like to fight in the snow. I knew a couple who used to do that, and it didn't work out, actually, although I don't think that was why. The other teams watch in some admiration as the two of them wrestle.
I have a feeling Meredith and Maria took a hell of a long time to get there and people suspected they might have been eaten by...whatever Iceland has, because when they finally arrive, everyone applauds. Mmm, patronizing! They pull the final 11:30 departure time and fall down in the snow. Wacky broads.
Spazpants has some kind of a team powwow in which Victoria says she was thinking he was bringing her over to yell at her some more, and he orders her to "calm down." She interviews that Jonathan is "so intense" (DRINK!), and she's "a normal person." I don't know about the last part. As to his attitude, he claims that it's "really affecting" her, although it's hard to believe she's surprised, since he seems to be like this constantly. He tells her that it's actually her fault, because with anyone else, he wouldn't have to be giving her all these orders. Oh, totally. Nothing soothes hurt feelings like, "It's not me, it's you." "Well, maybe you should have taken someone else," she says. "Maybe I should've," he agrees. Lord, get the hook. Jonathan interviews that the problem is her failure to "step up and realize the competitiveness of what's happening here." I'm sure that's it. She then tells him that she's going to change her name, because she's so sick of hearing him yell it. That would be a tiny bit funny if it weren't so unbelievably depressing.
Commercials. I admit that uncoordinated guys dancing is a pretty reliable device.
The next morning, the racers slowly wake up. "We're cold," El Hornio remarks intelligently. "Morning, baby," Jonathan creeps. "Morning," she chirps back. "Do we love each other again?" he asks. "Mm-hmm," she says. Icy fingers grip my spine. Victoria interviews that she's just going to take all the crap he dishes out, because she wants to win, and she knows fighting is counterproductive. That's why she's not fighting with him on the race. Still a mystery: the part where she's married to him. My favorite part is where we move to Don and MJ sharing a smooch, and then there's a big shot of the sign where their departure time tag was, which now says simply, "TAKEN." Heh. Taken, indeed. That was very nice. He tells her she looks like "a Russian peasant" in her knit hat; she giggles and teases back that he looks like "a Stanford dummy" in his college cap. Hee hee. In other news, Lena still hates camping. And I'm not sure I needed to see Gus's underpants as he's getting up, but aside from a very select group, I don't really want to see anyone's. Gus uses snow to bathe himself, so I'm sure he smells fresh as a daisy now. Bolo just wants to "get the hell out of here." "Ah'm so cold mah implants're frozen!" Lori remarks as they board their shuttle to leave the glacier. Snerk. Hayden doesn't have implants or doesn't wish to discuss them, so she simply says that she can't feel her toes. Hey, everybody freezes differently. Their shuttle leaves.













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