Amazing Race
The Princess Reminded Me Of My Grandmother. She Was Very Old But Still Very, Very With It

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He ain't heavy, he's my lobster

Meanwhile, the Chipsters are asking the ticket agent for help with a booking from Madras to Kuala Lumpur. The guy tells them no; he can't do the booking from there. Chip voices over that the folks at the airport were really only interested in helping with bookings on Air India or Jet Airways. Continuing to Chip away at the problem, he asks whether the agent can get a travel agent for him. Before you know it, a travel agent appears and tells the Chipsters that he can make the reservation they want, but not from the airport -- they need to do it from his office. Reichen explains that the travel agent invited them to go to his office with him to do the booking, but his office was -- dum dum duuuuum -- an hour from the airport. He tells us that if the booking worked, they would land in Malaysia ahead of the other teams. As they leave the airport in the cab, Reichen says that he and Chip are doing their own thing and not worrying about the other teams. Yeah. Uh, congratulations on your originality, and...leave a trail of bread crumbs in case you never return to the airport and CBS security has to go off looking for you. They'll appreciate the head start.

The Cochin-to-Mumbai flight takes off at 8:30 AM, carrying the clowns, Millie and Chuck, BuffJon and Kelly, and David and Jeff. Meanwhile, Chip nervously explains in the taxi that after "a lot of research," he and Reichen decided not to take the Mumbai flight and instead try for the route through Madras. He clarifies, however, that they still don't actually know whether they can get on the flight. When they arrive at the travel agent's office, moreover, they find that it's all closed up, even though, in theory, it was supposed to be open. The agent gets on the phone with his boss, presumably asking him to come in and take care of the crazy Americans with the camera guys. Chip laughs ruefully as he explains that they're a little screwed here. "You have to do it now," he tells the agent. Hey. Back off, Chipster. Don't spit on the service economy. "We'll do it. You don't have to worry about that," the agent assures him. The Chipsters look dubious.

Commercials. Buy Crest Night Effects, and you can blind strangers with your smile. Quite literally.

Back in Cochin, at the PL Worldways Limited travel agency, the Chipsters are anxiously awaiting the arrival of the boss so that the agency can be opened. Chip asks the agent what they're going to do if the boss doesn't come, and the agent assures him that the boss is on the way. Finally, the boss does show up, and opens the doors of the agency. The Chipsters explain what route they want to take to Kota Kinabalu, but the boss looks on the computer and breaks the bad news that there are indeed no seats available on the key flight. "We made a mistake," Chip mutters flatly. "So we're going to get eliminated." Way to have that hang-in-there attitude, man. A strange, brief interlude of what would normally be The Honking Horns of Wacky Hijinks pops up before we leave this tense scene. Beware -- I believe this tense travel drama is about to erupt into a cream pie fight.

Meanwhile, at Mumbai International Airport, the flight carrying all four of the other teams is landing. The teams don't stay together, but instead take off for assorted parts of the airport. BuffJon and Kelly find a guy who explains to them that if they want to leave right now, the only option is to go on Air India from Mumbai to Singapore, and then to Kota Kinabalu. It appears that BuffJon expresses some interest in Kuala Lumpur, but the guy is telling him Singapore. Elsewhere, Millie and Chuck snag the same route through Singapore. These two feuding teams wind up on the same flight to Singapore. ClownJon and Al, meanwhile, are back at the Mumbai airport booking a route that goes through Kuala Lumpur. Before he makes the final booking, ClownJon looks his ticket agent in the eye and leans down on the counter. "Is this the fastest way to get to Kota Kinabulu [sic]? Are you sure?" The guy smiles and nods. "Shake?" says ClownJon, holding out his hand. The guy, still grinning, shakes his hand. "Book it," Jon says resolutely. See, that's more evidence for my old theory that I'd heard way back when that they couldn't book flights and then change them. See how he wanted a commitment from the guy before he said to book the flight? Why wouldn't he just book it and then keep poking around looking for better flights? I'm so confused.

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Amazing Race

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