Amazing Race

Episode Report Card
M. Giant: A- | 1018 USERS: B
YOU GRADE IT
Melon Vs. Melon

Jill and Thomas go for another ladder, him telling her not to look up because then the water will hit her smack in the face. That's the difference between your Notre Dame and your cosmetology school right there. We get to see a close-up of the brackish pond-water the peasants are throwing, and it doesn't look at all nice. "Woo-hoo, we're medieval!" Brook whoops as she and Claire top the wall. The three lead teams, all of them completely soaked, grab their flags and run to the lake.

Gary and Mallory stop at a gas station for directions, and discover that their left front tire is flat. Jonathan and Connor, who left Stonehenge with them, get out, take in the situation, and quickly decide that they need to get going. Gary and Mallory understand, and Mallory even fist-bumps them as they promise to catch up, but dude, I'm starting to think you don't want to be driving in front of Team Glee. "This is not how I pictured my day in the English countryside," Mallory says as she wrestles the spare. Hey, we can still get some culture out of this. Just say "puncture" instead of "flat tire," and if you do say "tire," spell it "tyre." See? Tally ho!

Gary makes good use of the commercial break to get the tyre changed (I don't think I could do it that quickly, especially taking into account that I would have tried to jack up the opposite side of the car) and are soon back on the road, although Gary's worried about driving too fast on what he calls the donut. No, Gary, in England it's a "scone."

Brook hollers Claire all the way to the moat and the boats. Jill/Thomas and Nat/Kat are right behind them. And let me tell you about these "boats." You ever see one of those kiddie pool/sandboxes shaped like a big plastic turtle, with a plastic domed cover that fits over them? These wood-and-canvas boats are almost exactly the size and shape of one of those covers, with one plank stretching across as a "seat" that's all but impossible to actually sit on. That's because these boats don't actually balance, or even float, really. The teams try to jump right in and tow themselves along the ropes that stretch across the moat, but the boats float so low and tip so easily that they almost immediately sink, and they all have to go back and start over. "We have to actually stay on the boat, not just swim beside it?" Thomas asks jokingly in an interview. Seems like even swimming under it would be easier than trying to sail it. Their displacement is so small that once you take on even a dram of water, you might as well be on the Edmund Fitzgerald. All three teams give it another try, and Jill & Thomas seem to be the first to figure it out -- him staying low in the boat while she pulls them along the rope. Can't argue with a solution that results in your teammate doing all the grunt work.

Amazing Race

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