Amazing Race
They're Slithering To The Finish Line Like The Rest Of Us, Part I

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: B+ | Grade It Now!
I'll stop the world and melt down with you

In the boats, Flo refuses to go any further. Zach assures her that she can indeed paddle the boat, but she insists that she can't. "My arms are so tired," she whines. Zach tries to get her to do it just a couple of paddles at a time, but she won't. "Zach, I'm not moving!" she yells. She voices over that she was "overwhelmed," and that her "brain had shut down." Yeah, no kidding. In the boat, she is all done. "Get me to the shore!" she demands. "I'm serious."

I think I just figured out what happened in this leg. Flo made her declaration that she wanted to quit, and then she let Zach talk her out of it. And then after that, she had even less responsibility than she had in the past for what happened to them, because everything she was doing was only because he made her do it -- because after all, she wanted to quit. If this were not her line of thinking, how could she possibly make a demand of him like "Get me to the shore"? It only works if you assume that he owes her something, and that's what makes me think that she has actually managed here -- by saying she wants to quit and then not quitting -- to maneuver herself into a situation where she sees herself as the injured party and is taking the position that Zach should be grateful to her. Anyway.

Back at the bikes, Ken and Gerard are finishing, the latter with help from the locals, who keep his bike from tipping over. Ken opens the clue as Gerard recovers from the trip. It tells them to go to the Boat Quay in Hoi An, where they'll find another route marker. Phil repeats it for your repeating pleasure. Gerard distributes money to his eager helpers, and he and Ken read the part of the clue that directs them to get on regular bikes now and ride back to the beginning of the course so that they can leave. They take off, just passing Ian, who is just now finishing. "Hey, Ian, was that hell or what?" Gerard asks. As they pedal back along the course, they wonder where Teri wound up, and speculate that she's nowhere nearby. They also chat a little more about how horrible that Detour was.

Cut to Teri, making no effort whatsoever to do the Detour as instructed, but instead just walking the bike along, still assisted by several locals.

Gerard is passed by a girl on a moped who squeezes him onto the shoulder. "God, she's gonna kill me and throw me into the lake over here," he mutters as she passes. "Thanks, darlin'." Hee. Then he passes Teri, calling out to her, "You go, baby, you got it in you. You go, girl!" Wow, he certainly is angling to fit in a lot of expressions I could live without in a short time. Teri chuckles as she continues walking the unwieldy bike.

Back at the boats, Flo voices over that she had given her all (blink and you miss it, I guess) to the boat paddling, so when she discovered that they had aimed for the wrong island, it was simply more than her little self could take. So she bails out, and they go back to the shore they came from. What strikes me as stupid about this is that she had to paddle herself back anyway, so I don't see why she wouldn't just suck it up and go to where they were supposed to wind up. Zach asks what they're supposed to do when they get out of the boats. "I'm going to quit this stupid game," she says as she heads for the shore. (FDD5.) Zach says that she's paddling fine now, so they should just go and get the clue and be done. "You can do it," he says. "I can't do it! Get me out of here!" she yells. (FDD6.) They reach the shore and climb out of the boats. As she stomps along the shore, Zach voices over, "Flo gets stressed out in these situations, and it's part of my responsibility on this team to make sure she's okay." That is quite an adventure in understatement. "I'll do it till we win," he goes on to say. I have to say, as weak-ass as her performance on this leg is, that's how remarkable I think Zach's display of perseverance is turning out to be. As they walk along the beach, he tells her that they need to talk about this quitting thing she's throwing around, because she's not the only one on the team. "I think we should talk about it, because it's my game, too," he says. She continues stomping away from him. Finally, he catches up with her. "Why don't we just walk over to the bikes and see if that's any easier, before we quit. If we're quitting, we're out of the game for sure. We should at least walk over to the bikes and see if it's possible, see what kind of time it takes. We come in seven hours late, we can still cross the finish line and have a good race." What's interesting is that Zach is almost trying to appeal to Flo's pride here, and she sorta...doesn't have any, or they wouldn't be in this situation to begin with.

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Amazing Race




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