Amazing Race
"This Is Gonna Be a Fine Mess"

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M. Giant: B+ | Grade It Now!
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Phuket Again

Bill & Cathi get their clue from Soap Island, and Bill's taking this one. Meanwhile, Zac and Laurence have stopped their boat and are drifting somewhere out in the middle of the sea. Laurence interview-excuses that they're used to using marine charts, so either the map or the compass was off. Either way, they're lost. Well, that's just embarrassing. This is like Andy & Tommy failing a snowboarding task, or Marcus messing up a tackling Road Block, or Justin and Jennifer getting stuck on an arguing Detour.

Ernie gets his clue pretty quickly, and he and Cindy take off in their boat in sixth place. Meanwhile, Liz and Marie become the last team to get a clue off the Soap Island clothesline. Bill's already on his way up the cliff, and Cathi explains their Road Block strategy: he might as well take them all, since they're not going to last long anyway. Although she doesn't use those exact words. "Like the view I have!" she calls up to Bill's butt. "Aw, you old lady," he mock-grumps back. She's amazed at how quickly he gets the clue, and hopes they can be out of there before the twins show up. As they sail off in seventh place, Bill says he might take up rock climbing. If only to keep treating Cathi to the view.

Zac and Laurence are trying to get their bearings, when fortunately another team's speedboat goes past in the distance. "What a bunch of useless sailors we are," Laurence says as they follow it. No argument here.

Team NFL's boat is approaching the floating village, and Marcus is hoping to get a fourth-place finish (and some applause) at the floating stadium. Which is funny, not just because the "stadium" is totally devoid of bleachers, let alone an audience, but also because they're actually in third. Of course Marcus has no way of knowing what happened to Ernie and Cindy. Amani and Marcus are the next to dock, but Jeremy and Sandy are right behind them. "Eyes open, babe, because you're really observant," Amani tells Marcus as they begin wandering through the labyrinthine docks and passages of the village. The first thing they see is a school, so they check there, figuring that's the most likely spot for a stadium. Meanwhile, Jeremy and Sandy have spotted an actual sign pointing them in the right direction. Or at least Jeremy has. They must have been the team Zac and Laurence followed here, because Wrong-Way Feldman and Wrong-Way Feldboy are docking as well, and soon spot the trail of signs. Glad to see they can navigate on land, at least. Amani and Marcus are reduced to wandering aimlessly as Jeremy runs to the floating soccer field, yelling at Sandy behind him to sprint. Phil tells them they're team number three. They high-ten like the passionate lovers they are, and do separate interviews about how they need to work on their relationship. Yeah, to extend Jeremy's used-car metaphor from the season premiere, I think the diagnostic printout from the guy at the shop is getting longer. On the mat, Phil tells them to look behind them, as Zac and Laurence arrive in fourth place. Congratulations to Team Adventure for having the sailing experience and navigational know-how to figure out that they needed to follow the Bickersons to the right island.

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Amazing Race

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