Amazing Race

Episode Report Card
M. Giant: A | Grade It Now!
Maui, Owie!

By now, Luke has found his seventh surfboard, the one with the fishing cormorants from the ninth leg. The surfboard does not bite him.

"We need things now to be difficult," Victor says to Tammy. "Not physically, but mentally difficult." She's like, "don't bother me, I'm trying to telepathically kick that slow-moving car out of our way." That mentally difficult enough for you, Victor?

That's an eighth surfboard for Luke, namely the one with the Romanian gymnast. Three to go. "We need Margie and Luke to slip up somewhere because they are freaking good. They are so good," Jaime says. Somewhere, someone tells Karma, "All, right, you've had your fun."

Tammy and Victor finally arrive at the surfboard fence, and the "Who's ready to build something from memory?" question tells them this is a Victor task. He runs over to the surfboards while Tammy and Margie hug each other hello at the spectators' area and commiserate over the difficulty of the pig-hauling. "Jaime and Cara have not even been here," Tammy calls to Victor. Post leg, Luke says through Margie, "When Victor got there, I had to focus to try to finish beforehand. I knew Victor would finish fast. He's very smart." Victor in turn frets in real time about Luke's head start as he roots through the boards. I should mention that all three of the board racks are facing away from each other, so it's not actually possible to cheat off of other Racers. Victor seems to find his first board, and sets it aside while Luke gets his ninth board in place: the Ruhpolding gondola. That leaves only number 10 and 11. "China," Luke reminds himself, running back to the pile. Victor seems to be wisely adopting the less running-intensive strategy of arranging his boards on the grass nearby rather than dashing back and forth to the fence every time. Victor's pants are also falling down, so he drops his as well at Tammy's encouragement. Tammy and Margie whoop at him like he's a Jonas brother. "I had my Speedo on still," he says. Yes, we can see that, thank God, while he bends over. Luke finds what he thinks is the tenth board, and Margie cheers, "One more!" But the camera does an ominous zoom in on the board's decal, which is a striped skull wearing sunglasses. What the? At what point in China did they go to a Grateful Dead concert?

As Jaime and Cara's driver pulls into the gas station, Jaime frets at him to do it quickly. As he runs around pumping, she laments their bad luck. He hurries back in, not having taken the time to completely fill the tank, and they both thank him for going so quickly. "I'm sorry that I yell, Reynold, but this is very stressful for me," Jaime apologizes. Karma's like, "Okay, then. Was that so hard?"

Luke is dragging a pair of surfboards now, as Margie says she can't even remember what they did the last leg. It was over 30 hours ago, after all. But now Luke has eleven boards up, the last two of which are wrong. He points, and the surfer girl shakes her head no. In the meantime, Victor has found the correct tenth board for his fence, which is the reflexology diagram of feet. Flashback to Tammy and Luke enduring the sadistic foot massage together. Luke puts up another wrong eleventh board, and gets shot down again. And by now, Victor has found a board that has a picture of scorpions on skewers for his eleventh slot. Let's watch Victor eating those again, shall we? Yeah, good stuff. 'Scuse me while I run to the kitchen for some french-fried onions. Luke tries another board in the eleventh slot, this one with some kind of tiki idol head on it, and guess what? Still wrong. Is he even trying any more?

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Amazing Race




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