Amazing Race
This Is More Important Than Your Pants Falling Down!

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Miss Alli: A | Grade It Now!
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Zach and Jill went up the hill

Back at the vault, Gerard and Ken are sorting and counting. In the park, Asshat is walking and arguing. "Wait a second," Teri says. "Well, they're all getting ahead of us," Ian bitches with a Dawson-esque arm-flap. Elsewhere, Zach and Drew are still trying to balance ambulatory function and arithmetic skill, as Flo and Derek keep an eye out for the street where the statue is. If you listen closely, you can hear Drew and Zach finally land on seventy-eight. Asshat is also on its way to the statue, and Ian again is raising his arms in frustration. "Come on, you gotta run, Teri," he snots, his hands on his hips like a nagging gym teacher. All he needs is a whistle and a clipboard. As Nerd Lust hunts for the statue, JVJ peeks at the clock. The results? Nerd Lust accurately records the 12, but as JVJ walks back to the vault, Jill adds up the clock numbers and gets seventy. Oh, dear. She also gets there by way of "sixty-eight, seventy," so I have to wonder how in the heck she added the numbers together.

Nerd Lust and JVJ arrive back at the vault, where the Bald Snark is still counting. In an interview, Zach talks with great amusement about the large number of stacks of coins with which the brothers were wrangling. Yeah, mock away, Zach, and get back to me when you can get from one to six without any mistakes. Back at the vault, Gerard sees the teams returning and panics. "I think we should go; I think we should abort," he says. Ack! "We should abort, we should abort, we should abort," he repeats. They pack up their stuff, afraid of falling behind the Numbers-Runners. They're unaware, for one thing, that this task was as tricky as it was, and that Run The Numbers might require you to go out looking more than once. In any event, they bail on the counting. In the same Alpalicious interview that has spawned much of their recent hilarity, Kenny mocks Gerard's ultra-serious barks of "Abort! Abort!" "Like we're some kind of space shuttle or something," he comments. They take to the streets to Run The Numbers. I'm telling you, they are going to get seriously burned by this task-switching if they keep doing it.

Nerd Lust tries out the combination with which they've returned, and they find that it's wrong. You'll recall that they have the number of trees wrong. In the park, Jill and John Vito peg the number of trees at forty-nine, and she's still got the clock numbers wrong as well. They run in to try the vault and find that Nerd Lust is still there, wondering what to do.

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Amazing Race

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