Amazing Race
This Is More Important Than Your Pants Falling Down!

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Miss Alli: A | Grade It Now!
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Zach and Jill went up the hill

FloZach reaches the road, climbing over a fence to get there. She's unhappy to see that the Bald Snark is close behind them. "I shot it second arrow!" Ian crows to Teri. "Third," she insists. "Second," he argues back. Do I have to give the two of you a time-out? Back at the shooting range, Derek isn't having any fun with the crossbow, especially given his having to squint with his sticky contacts and everything. He does, however, manage to hit the apple so that he and Drew can leave. Jill looks worried as John Vito waits for his next shot. Ken and Gerard look down from the road to see that Derek and Drew are on their way, so they turn and get going. The twins, meanwhile, try to figure out which way everyone else went to find the chalet. Teri and Ian, incidentally, are clearly behind Derek and Drew at this point, so something slowed them down leaving.

Another shot goes astray for John Vito. "This is crunch time," he voices over.

Commercials. How did a bald man in a mesh shirt wind up on a Dinty Moore ad?

When we return, yet another John Vito shot does not find its mark. "Don't get frustrated," Jill says with forced nonchalance.

FloZach is on the way up the mountain, and Flo is flagging. "Zach, I can't breathe very well," she complains. She interviews that it was very steep, and that the air was "thick" (by which she means "thin"), and that she was having trouble just keeping up. She bugs Zach to ask for a taxi, but when he asks, he's told that there aren't any in the area. Over in even nastier news, Teri and Ian climb over a wire fence, and he says to her, "Watch your crotch!" Oh, well, I needed to hose down my brain anyway, so thanks for the motivation. She reaches the fence. "You need to help me," she snaps. She manages to briefly strand herself straddling the barbed-wire fence, which offers me a glimmer of amusement in this Theater Of Ugliness they have going here. I would also point out that for all his yapping at her to hurry up, he is already breathing very hard at this point.

The situation is this: FloZach, Gerard and Ken, and Derek and Drew are all running down the road together. Ian and Teri are just catching up. Jill and John Vito are still back at the crossbow. And no one really knows how to get to the chalet. Derek asks for directions, and the group takes off up a steep hill. "Zach, I can't," Flo complains. "Yes, you can," he answers lightly. "I can't breeeeathe," she whines. "Give me the bag," he says, as she's already taking off her pack. Now they're heading up, and he has not only his big pack, but on his other shoulder, he has her far smaller pack. In fact, this makes me notice that her pack is a lot littler than his, to the point where I think he's probably carrying some of her stuff in his pack already.

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Amazing Race

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