Amazing Race
Amazing Race

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: B+ | 493 USERS: C+
YOU GRADE IT
Thank You India, Thank You Providence

Bikes. Guidos. Flag. Phil explains that as the teams reach the train station, they'll learn that they need to get to the Red Fort marketplace in Delhi, India. No international airport nearby means taking a train to a city where there is one, like Rome or Milan. Inside the train station, Joe asks for an "international air-o-port-o." Yes, I do know that the real Italian word for "airport" is rather like that. But combined with the fact that he says "international" and the poor quality of his accent, Joe just sounds like he's adding some "o"s to things to see if they can be understood in Italian. It really doesn't sound like "aeroporto" as an Italian word. It sounds like "air-o-port-o." Honestly, I can't address the quality of their French, but it certainly looks like they know nothing more than tourist-phrasebook Italian. After getting the information, Joe tells Bill that they could try Milan, but Bill immediately snots that that's "not the right choice," and Joe immediately says that "Roma" is likely to have better flights. Why does he say "Roma"? Because he's cool and sophisticated, dammit! When will you learn?

Esquire at the train station. After briefly mentioning both Milan and Bologna, the boys decide to go to Rome as well. In other news -- and I hate to say it -- I hate these knit hats almost as much as the other hats. "There are Bert and Ernie," says Brennan as they approach the platform. As the teams board the train, Bill seems to pause, noting an older lady who's struggling with opening the door of the train compartment. Joe impatiently snots, "Just get on, just get on." Do the Guidos really need to negatively affect their karma any more by mistreating old ladies? The boys follow them onto the train.

Drew, in the glider. "Oh, boy, oh, boy. Holy…mackerel. Oh-ho-ho…oh, my goodness…oh, wow…oh, my goodness…holy fuck…oh, my goodness…holy [expletive deleted while lip movement not visible]…ah, ha ha ha!" No, really. That's what he said. I just do the transcribing around here.

Momily, biking. Kenny, biking. Kevin and Drew, saying goodbye to Uncle Junior and running from the airfield. Momily at the train station. Emily is wearing two pigtails today, and incidentally, that's a safe look on almost any girl, because it's so endearing in concept that people will cut you big slack on the execution. They read the clue, and Nancy is jazzed about going to India. Yeah, you're right. That's gonna look a little ironic later. Lenny and Karyn get to the train station, too.

Amazing Race

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