Amazing Race

Episode Report Card
M. Giant: A- | 1238 USERS: B
YOU GRADE IT
We Are No Longer in the Bible Belt

What's this? Why, this, as Phil says, is Patagonia, "the rugged grasslands of Southern Argentina." He compares it to the American West, a "boundless prairie...scattered with livestock and ranches." One of these, Estancia Fortin Chacabuco, was the third Pit Stop. All twenty square miles of it? Even the giant finish line mat isn't that big. Jet and Cord, the first to arrive, won the privilege of appearing in this season's on-air Travelocity commercial at the beginning of the episode where they get online to research the trip they won. "Might have to take our new cowboy friend with us," Cord adds, putting his hat on the gnome. At first I thought he said "cowboyfriend," which would have been like an entirely different thing. Anyway, they get to leave at 10:57 PM, which may or may not have any relation at all to their arrival time. "Make your way to Hamburg, Germany," Jet reads from the clue. Phil says that's an 8,000 mile flight (and their first one since arriving in Santiago in the opening leg) to Frankfurt, followed by a train ride to Hamburg. Frankfurters and Hamburgers in one day. Then they'll have to walk to Jungfernsteig Street to find their next clue. And not to give anything away, but the clue box seems to be indicating an Intersection. Banjo music accompanies the Cowboys' departure from the ranch, as Jet points out city lights in the distance. Cord assures him that says there are cities all over the world. "We're country, if you can't tell," Cord reminds us, even as the LED headlamp clamped on the front of his cowboy hat makes him look somehow like he's in the sci-fi movie Westworld. They drive into town -- Bariloche, I assume -- looking for someone to get directions from. For some reason they pass the first pair of prostitutes they see, missing the chance to learn about these streets from women who walk them every night. Instead, the Cowboys get out and walk themselves, until they find a travel agency. The agent tells them the first flight is at 11:10 the following morning. As they leave, Jet remarks alliteratively, "It's gonna be a footrace in Frankfurt." On to the airport.

No more departure times for you this week, as we next catch up with everyone else when they're already at the airport. Louie and Michael are starting to notice that they haven't been doing as well as they might have boasted in their pre-race interview. "But we're gonna stay positive," Michael interviews. Brandy interviews that she and Carol were "very wound up" on the last leg, which is a nice way of putting it. They've decided that their word for the day is "respectful." No indication on what the word will be for tomorrow, when they'll actually be arriving in Germany to run the leg. He-Jordan interviews, "Dan does not love traveling." So why'd he go on the damn race, then? Almost as if the Amazing Editors can hear us asking that question, they play us a clip of Dan explaining to us that he did it for Jordan. "He said it's the only thing he ever wanted to do." He's just helping make his brother's dream come true. This interview is the kind of thing you normally hear from a team at the beginning of its last leg in the race. I'm just saying.

Amazing Race

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