Amazing Race
Amazing Race

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: A | 513 USERS: C+
YOU GRADE IT
Thai one on

Mary and the Fruit and Jeebus book flights. In the Boston cab, Chris explains their strategy, which is to "kick everybody's ass." That's quite brilliant. Perhaps he could write that one down for me.

Everybody but Boston makes a 1:55 flight from Windhoek to Johannesburg. As Boston works the ticket counter, Chris observes Blake's rhino sitting on the agent's desk. "Apparently, one of the other teams gave their rhinoceros to her...very suspicious," he says with a wary eyebrow pop. This is actually Chris's funniest moment ever, and I did chuckle. They eventually get a 3:00 flight, so we are indeed in for the Mega-Bunching.

In the Johannesburg airport, in what actually will turn out to be a significant development, the Teeth and Gary and Dave go to the counter and pursue better seats on the connecting flight to Bangkok. "As far forward as possible," Dave asks. He'd like to be "sitting next to the pilot" if the agent can arrange it. Heh. In other news, Blake thinks that once they arrive, Paige should sell her hair, because blonde hair is such a rarity in Thailand. He's officially kidding, but he's also clearly eyeing her scalp. I'm telling you, something about Blake just makes my skin crawl.

As everyone waits for the Bangkok flight, Blake decides to try to clear the air with Wil. Well, if by "clear the air," you mean "blame Wil and absolve himself." He approaches the Weasel and says that since Paqueta Island, Wil has been trying to "make [Blake's] life a living hell." In a true display of bull, Blake says, "I came on this trip to have fun, and it's not fun anymore." No, no, no, Blake. You cannot have it both ways. When other people say you're an ass, you say it's a race, and you're there to play the game, and I've always stuck up for you. But then you can't say you just came to have fun. Man, nothing bugs the hell out of me like people who want to have it both ways.

Tara defends Wil's insufferable ass, Wil acts like an insufferable ass, Blake is self-righteous, Dave is watching with great interest, blah dee blah. "If you're having fun, is it at all of our expense?" Wil asks plaintively. I really, really detest Wil and his entire wounded-fawn routine. I honestly expected him to whip out a hanky here and start dabbing his eyes with it like some kind of jilted southern belle. After Blake walks away, Tara smirks self-satisfiedly. Short version? Everyone involved in this conversation is an idiot. They can all eat each other and I won't miss any of them. As Blake bares his teeth (AAAAH! MY EYES!), Wil tells Tara that Blake wants to "latch on like a bloodsucker" as they head for Thailand. I really don't think it's that, exactly. I think Blake feels a weird obligation to try to act like he cares whether people like him, when actually he doesn't. But Wil, of course, sees everything through the lens of his own ego, so...whatever.

Amazing Race

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