Amazing Race
What Happens If I Slip? Am I Just Hanging Off A Cliff?

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: A | 1 USERS: A+
YOU GRADE IT
Don't read 'em and weep

John Vito, Ian, and Zach hunt the clue in the vats of dye. Ian is next to find one, and...you know, he actually hides the remaining clue when he leaves. What a jackass. There are two clues fairly near each other, and he buries the other one after he gets his. What. A. Jackass. God. John Vito and Zach find their clues shortly in spite of Ian's efforts. All three of these teams load into their cars again and take off for the pit stop.

On the Aahab bus to Fez, Aaron says that they don't have any idea where Mike and Kathy are, but they could be in front or behind. He also points out that even though he and Arianne are sucking so much wind that they're affecting the tides, they might still come around at some point and begin racing a little more effectively. Well, he uses different words, but that's the general idea.

JVJ and FloZach all step on the mat together, as what Phil calls "teams number four." Ew. Teri and Ian are close behind, with him bitching at her to wait for him as she goes into the fortress. They're team number six. Whatever.

Aaron finds the clue in the vat of dye, and now they're approaching the pit stop. Aaron, optimistic little devil that he is, says, "I think we're pulling in last." Whine, whine, whine. They run up to the mat. Phil drags it out for them for a minute before telling them that they're seventh. Arianne laughs this breathless gaspy laugh that would be all right if it weren't eighty-five percent snort. Once again, they're saved from sucky racing by someone else doing even worse. They're like cats with nine lives, although I'd have to come up with an animal far more annoying than a cat if the comparison were to be truly accurate.

At some time in the future, Michael and Kathy finally arrive at the pit stop. They step up to the mat, and are Philiminated. Phil asks them how the whole long-distance relationship thing went, and they said it went great, so Michael is going to try to get Kathy to move closer to him, although he makes it sound like he's going to try to get her to help him hang up a black velvet Elvis. But that's just the way he talks. I have to say, I think it's interesting that their version of finding out what it would be like to spend time together as a normal couple was, you know, this. I would think they still might not have experienced completely normal circumstances. Anyway, they like each other, which is fine. In the end, they were way too laid-back for the race, so their elimination comes as no particular surprise to me.

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Amazing Race

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