Amazing Race
Amazing Race

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: A | 477 USERS: C+
YOU GRADE IT
Once more, with feeling

Meanwhile, the second bus has arrived. Everyone runs toward the clue box. Once they check out the options, the peer pressure in this group is strangely backwards. Andre and Damon, Dennis and Andrew, Teri and Ian, and Heather and Eve all initially opt for the donkey carts. Have they never seen this show? This is a classic Reckless/Chicken detour, and the Chicken option is designed to suck, because they want to see you do the Reckless! Losers. Taller Annoying Girl -- who it turns out is Heather -- wants to skydive, but Shorter Annoying Girl (Eve) got enough crazy thrills from her wacky antics cutting off other people in traffic, so she's not up for it. It's a good thing, too, because I couldn't be happier they wound up on this particular cart with this particular donkey. (Putting, as Mr. Pseudostudent said, the tart before the horse. Snerk.)

Jill continues her slow murder of the white van. Now it's smoking from the underside. Yeah, I wonder why.

Much slow donkey-riding. "Ben-Hur ain't got nothin' on this," Andrew observes. As Heather and Eve are about to get going, their driver gets out to go and pull the donkey or something. As he does, the donkey decides to turn to the side a little. This dislodges the donkey cart, causing it to suddenly pitch and tip over forward. If you watch this part on very slo-mo (as I did several times), first you will see the girls sort of land on their knees against the front of the cart as it whomps against the ground. But the momentum is too much for Heather, who continues right out the front of the cart and lands directly on her face in the dust. Now we could sit here, and I could tell you that I really hope she wasn't hurt (which I do). And I could tell you that I've been in enough embarrassing situations that I certainly feel for anyone to whom something that horrifying actually happens (which I have). And I could tell you that in reality, there was no harm done except possibly to her shirt (which there was). Or I could be as honest as I possibly can, and tell you that if I ever find that donkey, I am going to give him enough money to allow him to retire and live out a comfortable life in Donkeyland, munching on whatever he'd like for the rest of his natural donkey days, while I sit in my house watching Heather fall on her nose in an unending loop until it stops being funny. Which will be never. It's even better when she immediately pops up, hoping no one saw her, and declares in her best no-problem voice, "This is a nightmare." She announces that they're skydiving. Heh. Way to make a grab for your dignity.

Amazing Race

Comments

SHARE THE SNARK

X

Get the most of your experience.
Share the Snark!

See content relevant to you based on what your friends are reading and watching.

Share your activity with your friends to Facebook's News Feed, Timeline and Ticker.

Stay in Control: Delete any item from your activity that you choose not to share.

The Latest Activity On TwOP