3:10 AM. Colin and Christie, working the dorky headlamps. You know, I got one of those as a gift last year, and I primarily thought of it as a funny gift, until I managed to come across it during a power outage. I now think of it as having been an awesome gift, which everyone should own, in the event you ever have to go spelunking in your own closet. They rip the clue, and it tells them to find the battleship Aurora in St. Petersburg, Russia. Yikes. Phil explains, however, that this isn't all. First, they will have to drive themselves into town and travel 20 hours by bus -- 20 hours by bus -- to Buenos Aires, and only there will they get flights out. That's 8000 miles by plane, by the way, after the bus ride. Which is 20 hours. C'mon, everybody, sing! "Three million bottles of beer on the wall, three million bottles of beeeer..." Okay, maybe not. Once they're in St. Petersburg, they'll find the battleship to get the next clue, if they can still remember to do so, considering that they'll be arriving in Russia in approximately a year and a half.

After Christie comments happily that they're "going to Russia," she voices over that starting out in first place is a good deal, and that to stay in first, they'll need to be "the team that makes the least amount of mistakes." Well, we'll just have to hope they're not the team that has the fewest determination and skill. They drive through the darkness. You know, intensely.

3:21 AM. Charla and Mirna are giddy about going to St. Petersburg, which they express by fist-pumping and yelling to the camera in unison, which has a Disney Channel vibe I'm kind of not digging. Excitement is good, but don't say it into the camera, goofs. As they're leaving, Charla talks with the heavy burden of noble sacrifice about how she and Mirna had to "defend [them]selves" in the last leg because Marshall and Lance were "attacking" them. Yes, that's just how I remember it. It definitely had nothing to do with Mirna butting into other people's conversations, adopting a sense of entitlement that would choke Martha Stewart, or generally being the biggest pain in the rear since carbuncles. As they get in their Jeep, Mirna explains that, "being a lawyer," she has to "deal with despicable human beings on a constant basis." I tried to think of something witty to say here on behalf of my profession, but after careful consideration, I'm going with, "Takes one to know one."